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Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Happy Halloween!!!

This is it... my big day. I have plenty of Candy surprises in store for the next few months but today I thought I'd offer some Tricks and Treats for your enjoyment.

10 Things That Sound Dirty on Halloween, but Aren't ...
1. So, What'd you get in the sack?
2. Once you get under the sheet, start moaning and groaning!!
3. Just hop on that broomstick and ride it!
4. Those small suckers are gone in a few licks!
5. I got the best piece from that house.
6. Quit screwing around on the porch!!
7. Stick your hand in and guess what you're feeling ...
8. It was so filled and heavy, I had to use TWO hands!!!
9. They'll suck you dry if they get their teeth in you.
10. I bobbed and bobbed, but couldn't get my mouth around it!!!

Why don't skeletons like parties? They have no BODY to dance with.

Why can't mummies go on vacation? They're afraid they'll relax and unwind!

Why did the ghost cross the road? To get to "THE OTHER SIDE"

What happens to a fast witch on a slow broom? She flies off the handle!

What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? Hoblin Goblin.

What happens when a ghost gets lost in a fog? He's mist!

Why couldn't the witch get pregnant? Her husband had a hollow weenie!

Why is Halloween a hillbilly's favorite holiday? Pump kin.

Top Ten Reasons Why Trick-or-Treating is Better Than Sex
10. You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.
9. If you get tired, wait ten minutes and go back at it again.
8. The stranger you look, the easier it is to get some.
7. You don't have to compliment the person who gave it to you.
6. The person you are with doesn't fantasize you're someone else, you already are.
5. If you get a stomach ache, it won't last nine months.
4. If you wear leather and chains, no one thinks you're kinky.
3. Doesn't matter if kids hear you moaning and groaning.
2. Less guilt the next morning from over-indulging.
1. If you don't get what you want at one place, you can always go next door to get more!!


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Sunday, October 29, 2006

Chef Ghoulicious Pantry of Candy

One pantry item I forgot to get a photo of is Chef Ghoulicious Can of Worms: Squirmallicious Gummy Earthworms. These are similar to other gummy worms that I'm sure you have seen around. Ghoulicious worms have a tangy crystal sugar coating similar to that of Sour Patch Kids, but not as sour. The taste and texture of Ghoulicious Worms have a sort of foamy quality that remind me more of Marshmallow Peeps than other gummy worms. Eat Me Orange worms are orange flavor; Water Wiggler light pink worms, watermelon (tasted like strawberry to me); Very Scary Cherry dark pink worms, cherry flavor and chewier than other varieties. Overall, quite tasty.

Box of Boogers Tangy gummy Boogies that look & feel real!
Similar texture to the Gummy Earthworms. These are quite large and if they "look real" I'm afraid of their owner! Snottermelon dark green boogies are watermelon flavor; Sour Green Boogy light green boogies, green apple; Lemon Loogy yellow boogies, lemon-lime (these were the most tangy of the flavors and I liked them best). mmmm... Boogies!

AbbieNormal Bag of Brains Abnormally Large Gummy Brain! 'Candy That Tastes Smart' Similar again to Marshmallow Peeps without the sugar coating this time. These are about the size of a fist. Frontal Lobe Berry is blue raspberry; Water on the Brain is watermelon. The scents of these are very appealing and they have very strong fruit flavors.

These are made again by
FLIX candy, the makers of Lip Pops and Projector Pops.

I would like to thank Kadavar of our
Brainnn Candy Contest for sending me some of these items as well as other items I'll be reviewing soon.

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Saturday, October 28, 2006

Fear Factor Candy

Let's begin this disgusting romp through the candy world of Reality TV with the Sour Cherry Chuck Bucket. The package describes these as, "Gummy Coagulated Balls in Candy Blood Ooze" and warns, Proceed at Your Own Risk.

The little bucket contains two small packets; one contains the Coagulated Balls, the other bag contains the cherry Ooze. The package doesn't explain how these are to be combined but maybe the balls are to be placed in the bucket then the blood ooze is to be poured over them then given to your unsuspecting little sibling or nerdy neighbor to play your own version of Fear Factor at home.

The cherry Ooze was somewhat boring, barely any cherry flavor and was sort of oily in taste and texture. The Balls are very cherry-ish scented gummies. CheesePuff thought these were really good. I thought they had a stronger cherry flavor than the Ooze but still not all that great.

Test Tube Acid Bath is a gummy shape suspended in sour liquid candy. Sour Cherry flavor has a large gummy worm and Sour Blue Raspberry has a gummy shark. The gummies were not particularly gummy, I suppose they were beginning to dissolve a bit in the liquid. The liquid itself is tasty, sort of a refreshing sourness in the flavors described.

Here you can see a better photo of the
Gross-out Gummy Platters. I've been eating candy for a long long time and I have eaten candies that I thought were not as tasty as I'd hoped they would be but those were no comparison to these platters.
The flavors available are:
Gummy Spaghetti: slimy candy worms with candy coagulated blood balls (flavors are lemon, lime and tropical fruit)
Gummy Breakfast: candy liquified liver, protein shake, duck egg and silk worm cereal (flavors are sour grape, strawberry, butter and chocolate)
Gummy Pig-out Platter: mmmm... pig parts (flavors are bacon and other amazing flavors)
I tasted the Gummy Pizza: crunchy candy fish eyes, worms and stinky cheese (flavors are cheddar cheese, lime, tomato and spicy pepperoni). I thought they were kidding about the stinky cheese but my taste buds told me otherwise. The candy chemists did their job well and I could not finish this candy. Cheesepuff took one sniff of it and ran away! I can't imagine what the other flavor combinations are like. The only all-fruit flavor looks like the Gummy Spaghetti and after tasting the Gummy Pizza, even the fruits have me a little leery of tasting any more of this candy.

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Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Battle of the Bugs -- Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters vs. Oriental Trading Crunchy Candy Bugs

Oriental Trading Realistic Crunchy Candy Bugs come in two varieties as shown in the photo. These have a really great fruity aroma. The gummy body is tangy but not sour. I couldn't pick any specific fruit flavor, I would just describe it as fruit. The candy shell is slightly softer than a Necco Wafer but with approximately the same texture. The shell had a slight chemical taste, I presume from the food coloring used.

Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters have two in each package. These have a sweet aroma, more like sugar than fruit. The gummy body was sweet and tangy but not particularly fruity. The Roach wing covers have the same texture as O.T. Bugs with less chemical taste. HP Roaches did leave a brown smudge in the bottom of the package tray which added to the gross-out factor.

Severed thumbs up for both of these.

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Monday, October 23, 2006

Purple Cow -- Blueberry Cupcakes with Mascarpone Icicng

"I never saw a Purple Cow Cupcake
'bet you never thought you'd see one
But I can tell you anyhow
I'd rather see than be one"
(especially the hanging out in a 350 degree oven part -- YOWCH!)

Happy Birthday, Aunt Tossie!

Blueberry Cupcakes
2 cups unsalted butter
1 cup packed light brown sugar
2 eggs
1/2 cup milk
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 1/2 cups cake flour
2 cups fresh blueberries

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line 24 cupcake tins with baking papers. Place the butter in a microwavable bowl and microwave 1-2 minutes, just until melted but not boiling. Whisk in the brown sugar. Let cool to lukewqrm temperature, about 4 minutes.
Whisk the eggs into the butter-sugar mixture. Add the milk, vanilla, salt, and baking powder; whisk to combine. Whisk in the flour until just combined. Fold in the blueberries.
Fill each baking cup two-thirds full. Bake until a skewer inserted into the middle of a cupcake comes out clean, about 20 minutes.

This cupcake recipe is adapted from Sara Neumeier's book, Cupcakes Year-round. This book has great recipes but the format could use a bit of standardizing with a Table of Contents so that when I'm looking for a specific recipe, I don't have to flip through the entire book looking for it.

Mascarpone Icing
1/4 cup unsalted butter, softened
8 oz. Mascarpone cheese
1 tsp. vanilla
1 lb. powdered sugar

Beat butter until light and fluffy then add Mascarpone and vanilla and mix to combine. Scrape the mixing bowl thoroughly and slowly add powdered sugar.

This creamy Mascarpone icing is the perfect complement to the slightly tangy blueberry cupcake. I was pleasantly surprised that the cupcakes didn't taste as much like blueberry muffins as I had expected.

When I was a little tiny baby, my Aunt Tossie cared for me while my Mom went off to work in the coal mines at 3M. From the stories I've heard, it is only by small miracles that I survived the care of my dear Auntie. I know she loves me but expect to get such a pinch the next time she sees me. Everyone join me in whistling "Happy Birthday to You" and doing a birthday jig for Tossie.

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Sunday, October 22, 2006

Jolly Rancher -- Frutas Enchiladas

My Spanish is a little rusty... Fruit Enchiladas?

Tamarind, Lime and Mango flavor lollipops with a Spanish flair.

I bought these pops at my local Big Lots store in a Halloween multi-pack. I have seen Tamarind mentioned many times as a Hispanic sweet flavor and without reading the package carefully, I tossed a big bag of these babies in my cart. I figured I would give the Tamarind a try and if I didn't like it, there was always Lime or Mango flavors left to soothe my sweet tooth.

When I tasted the Tamarind pop, I was under the impression that the Tamarind itself was what made this pop spicy. After a big spicy surprise with the Lime pop, I read the ingredients list and each of the pops has chili powder.

Don't think I'm cruel here, but I let CheesePuff taste the Mango pop, because she is my taster-helper. Her reaction, "They ruined a perfectly good candy with chili powder!" That was pretty much my sentiments about these pops.

The Tamarindo flavor pop has a spicy, musky scent and a sweet, tangy and spicy flavor that I thought was really bizarre at first but it grew on me a little even though it was too spicy for me to finish.

Lime flavor was a really real Lime flavor, not "American" Lime candy flavor. Very enjoyable in a different kind of way.

Mango flavor pop has a slight of Mango aroma. I wouldn't say this has a true Mango flavor but it was still very good.

I can't imagine choosing these as a treat but they were fun to try anyway. Perhaps if I were hosting a Spanish-theme party, these would be a fun addition to a gift pack.

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Monster Lip Pops

Finally found 'em.

The two on the left I found at Michael's Craft Store. The two on the right I found at Target. They have quite a different look don't they? I'm guessing that's Target's special packaging. Both are made by FLIX (the same company that makes the original Lip Pops). I did notice that the Target Pops were available in Green Apple as well as the Blue Raspberry and Watermelon flavors that I've found at Michael's. I haven't seen Green Apple in any of the Michael's Lip Pops.

I don't have a photo, but I also found some Halloween Projector Pops (I talked about those here). They have a lollipop similar to a Push-Pop and in the Pop handle there is a small lighbulb that shines a selected shape. I only found Pops with a ghost projection. The ghost image is kind of cool but at short distances (say, a few inches from a surface), otherwise it just becomes a red blob.

I believe I sent the Projector Pops along with the Brainnn Candy Prize Baskets so maybe one of our contestant-friends will let us know how the Pops tasted.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Happy Year-and-a-Half-iversary, Bloggity

Since I totally flaked on Dear Bloggity's actual Anniversary date (April 16) because it was still tax season (the last tax day was actually April 18 this year in Maryland) and Mr.G was suffering through foot surgery... I decided to celebrate at the half-year instead. Because as we all know, my schedule is so uncluttered at this time of year. HA! So keep a watchful eyeball out for those gross candy posts... they're a-comin' I assure ya!

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Brainnn Candy Contest -- The Final Countdown

I don’t think our missing contestant is going to surface so let’s just hope she’s okay.

Yes we have a winner!
Three winners, actually… well heck, you’re all winners in my book!

Here are the answers for Round 3

1. Name the cracker company who for years had a recipe for Mock Apple Pie on the box back. (1 point)
Answer: Ritz Crackers (MrG found this recipe for me recently and I may have to surprise him with one of these tasty treats!)

2. Name the movie from 1966. Horrible acting and laughable special effects elevate this story of a family ensnared by a satanic cult a notch above your average bad horror film. Highlights include a Satan-like character who can’t stop laughing; the dreaded hounds of hell (or are those mangy dogs with big ears glued on?); and Torgo the monstrous henchman, who you know is evil because he has giant knee caps (a sure sign of the devil’s work). Yes, there’s even a catfight between gals in sheets! (2 points)
Answer: Manos: The Hands of Fate (Lordy what a treat this movie is!)

3. Fudgie the Whale is a versatile ice cream cake in the shape of a whale and was originally decorated as such, over the years the shape was adapted for holiday uses. The Easter Bunny could be depicted by using the whale's body as the face and the tail decorated to be his ears. Other characters, like leprechauns and Santa Claus were depicted in much the same way. Fudgie the Whale was often promoted around Father's Day, using the slogan, "For a whale of a dad." Name the ice cream company that developed Fudgie the Whale. (1 point)
Answer: Carvel (Remember a barely coherent Tom Carvel asking you to buy his ice cream cakes?? He must have been the idea man behind MrG’s favorite, Cookie O’ Puss.)

4. The first of these was built in 1936, and was 13 feet long. It cost $5000 to build, and was made in Chicago. The most recently built one is 27 feet long and seats 6. Its V-8 engine is definitely needed to power this thing, and looks like it not only needs lots of gas but could give you lots of gas too! What unique yellow and orange item is this? (2 points)
Answer: The Oscar Meyer Weinermobile

5. This West Point attendee is considered to have popularized detective fiction as well as creating poems and stories of a more macabre nature. A rose and a glass of Cognac are left on his grave every year by a mysterious fan. (1 point)
Answer: Edgar Allan Poe

6. Name the cool ghoul TV personality who performed autopsies on Jell-O. He also hosted a weekly horror movie show and recorded a song which cracked the US Top 10 chart in the 1950's. (1 point)
Answer: John Zacherle

7. This Hollywood legend plays a doctor brought back from the dead, kept alive by drinking human blood. This may be the first film character to pet white furry animals as an indicator of insanity. The white stripe in the hair was also a clue. Who is this actor/actress? (2 points)
Answer: Humphrey Bogart

8. Name the cartoon from the 1970's that featured Dracula, a Witch, a Werewolf and a Mummy living together in a haunted hotel cracking jokes and singing songs to warp little impressionable minds like mine. (1 point)
Answer: The Groovy Goolies and they all lived at Horrible Hall

Then we had the tie-breakers for the Prize Baskets

For Jademage and Food B*tch

1. Who is MrG.?
Answer: My husband
2. Who waits with CheesePuff while my cupcakes bake?
Answer: Jar Jar Binks
3. In which of the United States did I grow up?
Answer: Wisconsin
4. Guess the dollar amount, without going over, that I recently spent on gross candy at Oriental Trading Co.(closest dollar amount wins).
Answer: I’m afraid to tell you but JadeMage was closest (without going over) at $114.95
5. Since I don't get many Trick-or-Treaters, what will I be doing with all the gross candy from Oriental Trading that I can't possibly eat? Be specific.
Answer: Sorry, you folks are not getting this candy… I’m selling it on Ebay.

For Hauntedwoods and Kadavar

1. Who is CheesePuff?
Answer: my daughter
2. What is the name of the pinball machine in my basement that CheesePuff is playing in one blog photo?
Answer: Space Invaders
3. Which Brainnn Candy contestant is my mother?
Answer: Coof
4. Which other Brainnn Candy contestant is a blood relation to me?
Answer: AJTossie is my aunt
5. There are two other Brainnn Candy Contestants that I have met in person. Name one of them.
Answer: Mbabes and Talulah Bankhead

Round 3 had a total possible score of 11 Points while the tie-breaker round had a total possible score of 5 Points for each group.

Here are the final scores:

JadeMage -- 35 points (First Prize)
mbabes -- 27 points
miss lapin – 25 points
Talulah Bankhead -- 13 points
Coof -- 22 points
Food B*tch – 34 points (Second Prize)
Kadavar -- 30 points (Third Prize)
Hauntedwoods/Adam -- 29 points
Rabbitch -- 25 points
AJTossie -- 3 points

Does anyone recall the mystery prize I talked about at the beginning of the contest? We have a winner of that too! Our winner is AJTossie for all her smart-alleck guesses. Everything from Young Frankenstein being offered WD40 before retiring for bed, to Little Lulu Goes to Hawaii as an answer to the Groovy Goolies Q. Her Prize? (and this was MrG’s idea) Chocolate covered ants! Just what she always wanted.

Prize winners should be keeping an eye on their mail carriers for signs of gross candy sneaking for the next couple of weeks (hopefully no deliveries take that long!).

I want to thank you all for playing and for making this a lot of fun for me. From the emails I've received, it sounds as if you all had a lot of fun too.

I have a bunch of new gross candy to be reveiwed so keep a watchful gummy eye out for that.

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Sunday, October 01, 2006

Brainnn Candy Contest -- Round 4???

I have had a wonderful time with this contest, compiling the questions and crossing my fingers that my clues would not make Googling those answers too easy. When I dreamed up this contest I had no idea how difficult you all would make it for me.

Currently, we have one contestant who has been with us all along and suddenly has not submitted answers. I'd like to just stall a little longer with the answers to Round 3 to give that last contestant a chance to get those answers in.

In the mean time, let me explain the title of this post. We have two contestants tied at First Place and two contestants tied at Second Place. Since I only have 3 Prize Baskets, we'll need to have a tie-breaking round. Jademage and Food B*tch are tied at 31 points each after Round 3. Hauntedwoods and Kadavar are tied at 28 points after Round 3. I will be posting questions to be answered by those four contestants only. Jademage and Food B*tch will receive one set of questions. The higher-score between those two will receive the First Place Prize Basket. The lower score between those two will receive the Second Place Prize Basket.

Hauntedwoods and Kadavar will receive a separate set of questions. The higher score between those two will receive the Third Place Prize Basket. Now, be prepared you four. These will be obscure questions that will most likely be guessing unless you read my blog and can recall tidbits of my personal life that have shown up here.

Each question will be worth one point.
Email me your answers at
I will post scores as your emails come in (in pairs). Changing answers will not be allowed. You get one shot. Answers posted in the comments section will be disqualified.
Here we go. Hopefully we can hash this out in one final round so we won't need to do this again.

For Jademage and Food B*tch

1. Who is MrG.?
2. Who waits with CheesePuff while my cupcakes bake?
3. In which of the United States did I grow up?
4. Guess the dollar amount, without going over, that I recently spent on gross candy at Oriental Trading Co.(closest dollar amount wins).
5. Since I don't get many Trick-or-Treaters, what will I be doing with all the gross candy from Oriental Trading that I can't possibly eat? Be specific.

For Hauntedwoods and Kadavar

1. Who is CheesePuff?
2. What is the name of the pinball machine in my basement that CheesePuff is playing in one blog photo?
3. Which Brainnn Candy contestant is my mother?
4. Which other Brainnn Candy contestant is a blood relation to me?
5. There are two other Brainnn Candy Contestants that I have met in person. Name one of them.

Good Luck one more time!