The Power of Cheese

Happy Halloween!

2010-10-24T14:35:00.000-04:00

Halloween is not until next Sunday but I will be busy making my yard, child, and self scary.
Please enjoy watching Buddy make a Zombie Cake.

Alien Cakes

2010-09-23T17:46:00.003-04:00

What's cooler than being infected by an alien and having the alien decide it's done with you and come bursting out of your guts? A cake depicting the event and having all your friends eat it.

Gross Alien cakes brought to you by LA Weekly.
http://blogs.laweekly.com/squidink/baking/10-grossest-alien-chest-burste/

The cake above in my opinion (and mine is the only opinion that counts until you leave a comment telling me what a moron I am) is the the finest of all the examples (and not just because it's covered in fondant, although that helps it to look smoother and more professional). Enough actual cake to feed the hungry crowd with plenty of gore to set the proper mood. Other cakes in the set had amazing ideas but the composition of it was off... too much slime, too much gore, not enough cake. The gore-to-cake ratio depends on you and your guests, of course but my personal taste (you may be surprised to know!) leans toward more edible cake. Gore is awesome but I want people to actually eat it once I've made it.

(Geez I hope that last comment doesn't bring a bunch of Al Gore Googlrs in here... won't THEY be surprised???)

Sculpted Camera Cake

2010-09-08T17:10:00.004-04:00

It's not a gory severed head, which I know would make you smile. It is an opportunity to learn. Yaaaay learning!!

From Geekologie.com

It looks complicated but it's the details that make it.
(...and that's what you want to accomplish. It should look difficult and amazing without causing you a coronary in the process.)

You can see that it is two simple layers of cake inside. If I were making this cake I would not use cream cheese icing, which is standard with Red Velvet. I would use a sweet, shortening-based icing (like the recipe from Wilton or the white 'bucket' Buttercream icing that bakeries use) which will do two things: 1) it will allow the fondant to stick to the icing; and 2) it will allow the cake to sit at room temperature without making the fondant buckle or sag.

The icing layer is thin so it doesn't add a lot of moisture to the fondant, which will cause tearing or bubbles.

The fondant can be tinted gray and then dry-brush a pearl powder at the end to achieve a sheen.
Writing and other small details can be made with royal icing or the same Buttercream you used in the cake. Both the Wilton icing and the bucket icing will air dry without affecting the fondant, much.

Something To Aspire To

2010-09-01T21:53:00.003-04:00

The amazing winners of the Threadless Cake Contest. The idea of the contest was to choose a design from one of their awesome t-shirts and turn it into a cake.

http://www.threadcakes.com/winners

If you click on the cake photos there are photos of how the cakes were assembled. If you're feeling reeeeally click-ish you can see the winners from last year and their instructional photos as well. Tons of great material here for the DIY set.

Creepy Cake Decorating -- Lesson one

2010-08-01T17:58:00.004-04:00

From The Wilton Website

My daughter spent last year in a Magnet School for Arts. One of the first things she learned was how to sketch. She had zero desire to sketch and instead, wanted to jump into sculpting and painting. I can't really blame her... I mean, when I think about doing art, crafts, or cakes, I'm thinking ahead to what I want the finished product to look like and I want to jump in and get started. However, through many previous errors in judgement, I have learned that sketching at least a rough idea of my project (hey! stick figures work) at the beginning helps things run more smoothly later.

So before I get you into sculpting your zombie heads, I think first you should learn some decorating basics. If it helps to keep the creepy creativity rolling, you can tint your icing a gruesome green, gray, or black.

Icing recipes and tips can be found here (this is my favorite icing) or here (this one is quick and easy to make but stiffer and dries out faster). For practice, tape a piece of wax paper on a table or counter. Then, you can use a spatula to scrape up the icing, put it back in the bowl and keep going at it until you feel really comfortable with the motions and you will get a more consistent border or design. Keep practice icing as just that. It can be stored in the freezer between uses and thawed in the fridge. Sometimes you can microwave it, if you're in a hurry but be careful not to melt it unless you plan to pipe puddles.

Don't ever use your practice icing when you are in a bind and need to bring a cake to Grandma's 80th Birthday Party.

If your naughty children sneak into the freezer and eat your practice icing well... whatever happens, it serves them right.

How to do it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4fiq1CWJS8

I told you last time that I would show you how to make a piping bag from parchment paper. Liv Hansen is amazing. Her directions are really good.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKAZB1IN6sw

I don't anticipate any major projects coming up, so you shouldn't have to wait quite so long for the next lesson. Thanks for watching.

So You Wanna Be a Creepy Cake Decorator?

2010-07-11T22:19:00.005-04:00

The beginning is always a good place to start and since we (that’s you and me!) are learning some of this stuff together, I figure I’ll just give some basic decorating information so we are on the same page. Those of you who already decorate and are just here for the pictures… you can check out my flickr.

There are online tutorials that show a lot of this stuff, so whenever possible, I will post those so you can actually see a person decorating. Then, I hope you’ll go practice because you can’t get better of you don’t practice.

But even BEFORE basic decorating, what do we need to do? That’s right! Go Shopping!!!

You can’t decorate a cake with the back of a spoon or with a butter knife. That’s just not the kind of creepy we’re going for around here. So, here is a list of basic equipment and why you need it.

The Whats:

8-inch offset spatula [Wilton 13-inch]
4.5-inch offset spatula (rounded end) [Wilton 8-inch]
4.5-inch offset spatula (tapered end) [Wilton 8-inch]
Some companies measure the whole spatula, some only the blade. The smaller number is of course, the blade measurement.
small, sharp scissors that will ONLY be used for food or food preparation
(no hair cutting scissors here!)
pastry bags
decorating tips #10, #3, #21
professional turntable (don’t go away yet!)

Ok, let’s start with that. If you buy ONLY these basics you will be set back around $50.00. If you were to buy grocery store cakes, you would spend that much on just a couple of cakes. We have to be smart about this. All of these things should be purchased new EXCEPT the professional turntable. Buy one of those on eBay. They’re easy to clean up and if they have a few scratches or dings, who cares??? It’s going under your cake board. A new turntable will soak you for $60. I got mine for five dollars plus about seven dollars shipping because they are really heavy. If you intend to decorate more than one cake it will pay for itself. Don’t get lured in by the tilting turntable or the one that spins by itself. They will not work well for cakes larger than 8-inches and you’ll just be dissatisfied. Get the heavy-duty one!

The Whys:

8-inch offset
The 8-inch blade is the perfect length to ice the whole side of a cake. Shorter, and you will have lines. Longer, and your arm will get tired from having to hold your elbow at a higher angle while decorating.

4.5-inch offset (rounded)
I use this for mixing smaller batches of icing color, filling parchment bags (I’ll get to those later), and smoothing fillings in between cake layers

4.5-inch offset (tapered)
I use this for smoothing an area I have piped to fill a design with color and for quick fixes of things like, a speck of cake in your icing.

Small, sharp scissors
I use Fiskars 5-inch Non-stick scissors. They are VERY sharp, the blades taper to a sharp tip. I like that they are very small and don’t take up a lot of room in my case.

Pastry bags
I prefer the professional type disposables but unless you work in a bakery, they seem to be impossible to get. I also use Wilton disposable. They are smaller, shinier and more slippery than the professional bags but, they work. You can get a box of 100 for around $20. Pretty great when you don’t have to wash them!

Decorating Tips
I suggest you buy a Wilton or Ateco #10 round tip for piping borders (the higher the number the larger hole) plus a #3, if you’ll be writing with icing. Most people also like a #21 star tip for piping shell borders, so let’s go for that too. They run about $1 each. You can buy couplers if you want, they also run about $1 each. Sometimes, if I know I’ll be using multiple tips with the same color I’ll use a coupler, but mostly I just stick the tip in the end of the decorating bag and leave it there for the duration. Decorating tip sets end up being wasteful, usually. I have a $50 set and use maybe 3 or 4 of those tips. The standard types of tips (for flowers, ribbons, and leaves) can be purchased individually.

Now, GO SHOP!

The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly -- A New Beginning

2010-07-08T18:56:00.005-04:00

Sometimes, change is good. Like, when I changed over to a Gluten-Free lifestyle and my belly didn't hurt EVERY day. I still make some mistakes in the Gluten-Free realm, but it's getting easier and I'm having fewer cravings, which makes me happy. I am sad that so many fun and creepy candies have Gluten because I really did enjoy buying all that candy and writing about it.

One drawback about being an artistic Pisces is, I get bored easily. Usually mid-way through a project I decide it's not fun any longer and tend to just drop it thinking, "Oh, I'll come right back to this in a day or two." That two days often becomes a year without my noticing.

So, bet you're wondering where my artistic head is off to now... huh? It's like watching a train wreck. You know something is going to happen that you probably don't want to see but you can't look away and then your dumb little brother comes along and changes the channel to watch sports before you actually get to the good and gory part!

I AM an unusual girl. How's that for a segue?

I love cakes. Baking cakes, creating new recipes, decorating cakes, going to cake shows and trying to figure out how the heck some people can make all those beautiful, amazing works of art that no one will ever eat.

I love scary stuff. Halloween, monsters, scary movies. I bet you didn't know I had my Halloween costume picked out in March. I decorate my yard and enjoy going to haunted houses (I even live in a real haunted house, but shhhh... that's our secret. We don't want any ghost hunters in here tearing up the place looking for ectoplasm).

After some heavy thinking, I've decided to marry these two crazy kids: Cakes and Creeps and see if I can't just make something I really enjoy and maybe you'll like it too. (Like the train wreck you got to see over and over because you hit the TiVo before your brother grabbed the remote.)

Giant Gummy Bear on a Stick

2009-02-28T11:41:00.002-05:00

Perfect for filling that giant empty corner of the kid's Easter basket.

From Vat19.com

Vat19 touts themselves as purveyors of curiously awesome products and this giant candy is no exception. After watching the curiously awesome video accompanying the product, I'm hooked! I know CheesePuff would love getting one of these in her basket from Mr. Cottontail on the morning of April 12, 2009.

Vat19 also has other curiously awesome products that I never knew I needed until scanning the files. A coffee mug with a picture of Vincent Van Gogh whose ear disappears when the mug is filled with hot liquid? Curious! Adhesive bandages with Batman-style ka-POW! statements? Awesome!

Marshmallow Peeps Diorama Contest

2009-02-16T20:08:00.002-05:00

Get your Peeps, Bunnies, and hot glue guns ready!

Found on Flickr

Each year several newspapers hold contests to see who can do the craziest thing with Marshmallow Peeps within the confines of a shoe box.

My lovely Auntie sends me the clipping from the St. Paul Pioneer Press in hopes that I will secretly submit an entry and somehow win the contest. Last year I had a pretty good idea and I still have it tucked away, for now. If the urge strikes me, I may follow through and finally send in an entry.

This year, I see the Pioneer Press is making it harder for me. They are allowing video. I can't quite tell from the article if that means two contests or if the videos will be judged against the still photos.

Entries are not yet viewable but will be available some time in the near future at http://www.twincities.com/peeps .

I'll let you know if I win.

Visit the Marshmallow Peeps where they live at Just Born. Join contests, join the Fan Club (you do get stuff, but it's not free), or just enjoy the cute.

Oh, and by the way, most Peeps are Gluten-Free, but be sure to check the label (I noticed the Peppermint Stars at Christmas time were not Gluten-Free).

Ritz Crackers Mock Apple Pie

2008-11-29T19:57:00.000-05:00

For some time I have been planning to post this recipe but it slipped my mind until now. MrG talked about on numerous occasions because he recalled seeing it on the back of the box of Ritz Crackers for years. He says, "When Chuck Yeager hit Mach One, Ritz Crackers achieved Mock Apple Pie."

It's something you just have to see to believe.

Mock Apple Pie

It looks like Apple Pie. I'll bet it even smells like Apple Pie with the addition of cinnamon. But there's no apples in Mock Apple Pie. The apples mock us in our stupidity from the produce drawer of the fridge. Yummy, tasty, juicy apples. Were apples truly that hard to come by in the 1960's that Ritz had to come up with an alternative for dessert?

Sadly, Mock Apple Pie is not Gluten-Free so I'm afraid all I can do is dream about this treat. *commence with the snickering*

Axl Gets The Doctor

2008-11-21T22:02:00.001-05:00

If you missed Yahoo News (don't worry, I space it off most of the time too) you'll be glad Mr.G was paying attention.

This Sunday, November 23 2008, log on to Dr. Pepper's Website to receive a coupon for a free soda.

My suggestion is to log on early before the website overloads and crashes. I'll be able to get a good jump on the competition for soda since my Thanksgiving flight to Florida leaves prior to the buttcrack of dawn.

Sweet Swap

2008-11-16T11:56:00.001-05:00

Salt Caramels

When I received an invitation to join a Sweet Swap hosted by Liz at What's to Eat Baltimore I was excited.

Then I recalled the horror story conveyed to me years ago when an aquaintence told me the story of the Cookie Swap she had recently attended. She told of a party of women bickering around a table of treats when one woman didn't receive her 'fair amount' of cookies. Someone else had received more than her and she was having none of it! An exaggeration by the story-teller? Maybe, but the story did make me wonder if this Swap was going to be a good idea.

Liz was a brave brave woman to invite a bunch of relative strangers to her home and I let her know I thought so in an email. But she seemed undaunted and I think that put me a little more at ease.

I had quite a long drive to Liz's place - over an hour according to my mapped directions. I gave myself plenty of time to get there (because I always seem to get lost whenever I have to drive further than around the corner) and I didn't get lost once! Which meant I arrived early.

The drive was really lovely and it amazes me that all that countryside is just beyond Baltimore. Just prior to the turn-off, there were gorgeous cattle in the field and surrounding the house were acres of corn.

I got to meet two other area bloggers, Katie at CupcakeRN and Courtney at The Practical Gourmet, each of whom brought a friend, and a few members of Liz's family. Everyone was really great and no one fought over the treats though there was an amount of fun treat-stealing while the swap was happening. I picked up some great recipes that I may try to convert to gluten-free very soon since my Baking Jones is almost out of control now that autumn is here.

The Salt Caramels were a good choice since no one else brought candy. They are Gluten-free. I also brought the makings of Sugar Cookie Martinis, which were really wonderful (and Gluten-free, yay!), if unphotogenic (they look like milk in a martini glass... I know you can imagine that).

To make Sugar Cookie Martinis I mixed Vanilla Vodka, Rum (I used sugar cane rum), Butterscotch Schnapps,and Licor 43 with half & half in a shaker of ice. They were really delicious. I don't have amounts of each liquor to give. A friend had one at a bar, conveyed the ingredients to me and I mixed and taste-tested to get the amounts correct.

I have to say Thanks again to Liz, her family, and the other bloggers and guests at the Sweet Swap. You made the experience really wonderful and not at all scary!

Good Friends

2008-10-30T18:02:00.005-04:00

You know you have good friends when they secretly send the perfect gift... what could be a more perfect Halloween present than giant eyeball, candy slime with body parts, and stickers with hairy backs and armpits???

...just the fact that it's all Gluten-free!

Thank you THANK YOU Karan!

(I do apologize for the hack-editing job. I don't have the fancy photo editor I used to have.)

Getting Over The Gluten Hump

2008-10-18T21:27:00.001-04:00

My family doesn't know it, but I am systematically phasing out gluten from their dinners. It's going to take some time but making two separate dinners - one regular and one gluten-free - is getting old very quickly. I spent most of the summer not cooking anything for anyone. I ate a lot of cereal in front of the TV at 9PM. Everyone else fended for themselves. That got expensive and I'm trying to help them help me. Hopefully we'll all be a little healthier in the process.

In order to make the gluten-free transition a little smoother for everyone I'm trying to find foods that everyone will eat. If you didn't know it before, or are new to reading here, you should know that Mr.G is one of the pickiest eaters on the planet. If it isn't chicken or Italian, you can pretty much forget it. I can eat a lot of chicken but CheesePuff complains if we eat it more than two days in a row. So now, instead of winging it for dinner, I've made a little calendar of dinners and made everyone aware that it exists and where it can be found on the fridge. To my surprise, they actually read it! I suppose asking for their input was helpful in the success of the calendar and I included days when they can have Chef's Choice (that's: whatever you make for yourself is your dinner) and days when they each cook for the whole family. Cheesepuff graced us with a lovely Summer Salad (a variety of lettuces, sliced apple, and toasted almonds) just tonight.

Having the calendar also helps me to know if I have to take out meats to defrost and helps me to grocery shop less often! I already know ahead of time what I'm going to cook so I don't buy ingredients I won't need (I tended to buy a lot of pretty produce that ended up in the bottom of the crisper, forgotten). I also am learning to cook smarter - I roast a whole chicken on a weekend and save the left-overs to be used in Chicken Enchiladas another day... and I already know ahead of time which day that will be so the extra chicken doesn't go to waste before I can use it or before I remember to stick it in the freezer.

This list has been helpful on many occasions to get me through the regular grocery store when I can't make it to the Organic Market: Gluten-Free Mainstream
It's a list of products one can typically find at a standard grocery store. If you've done any checking on the Internet for sources of gluten-free foods you'll find long, long lists of foods that are ok to safely consume. Lists are helpful but long lists make my eyes glaze over. You'll also find a lot of links for Internet ordering of gluten-free foods but who has time to grocery shop on the Internet and wait for delivery? Not this chica. This list is compiled so you can look up 'spaghetti sauce' and find brands that are tasty as well as safe. I know if I came home with a jar of spaghetti sauce that boldly stated it was Gluten-Free, Mr.G would wrinkle his nose and head for the peanut butter and Ritz crackers. However, using this list and carefully reading the ingredient list on the jar of his preferred spaghetti sauce, I realize it is indeed gluten-free and it's safe for me to eat. Of course, being spaghetti sauce, I have to cook my own Gluten-Free pasta* or slice up some yummy Polenta to go on my plate. I tried to get them to eat Quinoa pasta, but they balked and asked to not find it on their plates again.

I've been doing a lot of reading about Celiac Disease lately and I forget where it was found, but I read that removing wheat from my diet is much like breaking an addiction and some days I really feel that. I feel I'm craving donuts, cakes, candy bars... any number of things I haven't eaten much of in a long time but now that I've told myself I can't have them at all, I want them more than ever. I did find Gluten-Free Cinnamon-Sugar Donuts by Kinnickinnc Foods at the Organic Market and they are amazingly delicious. I would never have known they were gluten-free if I found them lying on a lonely plate in the breakroom at work. I told myself this was a treat to satisfy my Gluten-Tooth (like a sweet-tooth, only different). If I tell myself a thing, it must be true, right? .

*Quinoa Spaghetti and Linguini are quite delicious, but if you followed this link, you probably saw those cute pagoda-shape pastas. I tried those and honestly, the texture and taste of them was quite different from the spaghetti. Based on my last purchase, I would probably not buy the pagodas again.

Sad Realizations

2008-10-08T20:49:00.002-04:00

Dear Friends, I'm not only sad I'm truly heart-sick.

I have lost a very VERY dear friend.

Her name is flour.

Yes, that soft, fluffy white powder that holds the butter and sugar of cakes together. For years... yes, really... years I have struggled with unusual ailments such as allergy attacks that seemed to come out of no where and abdominal pain that came on some time after breakfast every day and many times escalated to the point that I could not breathe, much less function as a normal human. I visited my doctor many times and he sent me for more tests and scans than I care to elaborate on. When all of the poking of my insides was done and there was no clear answer, he wanted to start over and do it all again.

At some point during the testing battery, I stumbled upon the Atkins Diet. I didn't feel 100% better but any improvement was like a miracle. My doctor was happy that I was complaining less and he didn't send me for more tests. But, like any diet, I got sick of the same thing every day and slid back into my old routine and back into discomfort. I asked my doctor about allergies and he told me emphatically, "No. It's not allergies. You would have a different reaction." But added, "Why don't you keep a journal of what you eat? If you find something that hurts your stomach, don't eat it."

That was it. I went home that day and started. I didn't eat much of anything at first, which is a little scary when you think of it... But, I finally came up with quite a list of foods that hurt when I ate them. And they were so random! At least that's what I thought until I began really looking at this thing called Celiac Disease. I heard about it quite frequently and even worked with a woman who said she had it and while she new she shouldn't eat bread, she sometimes still did anyway, knowing she would suffer later. Hearing about a thing and actually relating it to yourself are two very different things, I assure you.

Then I read this book.

Find it at Amazon.

All my sudden allergy attacks and digestive ailments started to make sense for once. I began reading the ingredients list of foods I had in my cupboards and refrigerator and threw out or set aside to donate any containing wheat, rye, barley, malt... anything that was likely to cause a problem for me. Luckily, there were a few items I still had around or I think I would have simply gone crazy because I'll be honest, some of my favorite foods contain hidden wheat and I have to cut out every one of them all at once!

So now what?

I have been living Gluten-Free for one week, except when we went out to dinner. I tried to be good. I didn't think a steak and baked potato would have some wheat secreted in there, but I knew it by the time I got home from the restaurant.

I can tell you, even if Doc refuses to diagnose me with Celiac Disease, I can't go back to eating wheat.

SO HOW DO I GIVE UP CUPCAKES?!!?
That is going to be a big problem for me, and I don't have an answer yet.

Halloween at Michael's

2008-09-28T13:06:00.001-04:00

Michael's Craft Store is one of my favorite places to browse at Halloween. They have an extensive collection of animated mini-village scenes in stores that are really cool. Apparently you can't buy them on the Michael's website.

This year Michael's has a nice variety of Martha Stewart craft products. If you have been unable to muddle through the copying of her stencils in the Martha Stewart craft magazines or website, Michael's now makes them for you.

A few treasures made it into my shopping basket including some Martha Stewart Baking Cups. Because one can never have too many cute papers for cupcakes.

The four styles you see on the right come in one pack of the Martha Baking Cups. There are two more packs of Baking Cups on the lower left that are Wilton. Only one of these styles was available when I checked the Michael's website and none were available on the Wilton website.

I found a couple of fun candies that I hadn't seen at Michael's before. Slithering Snake Suckers from Bee International were surprisingly affordable. The 12-inch snake (stop snickering, fools) was under $1.50. The flavor key on the package reverse says the candy snake can be found in

Green = Apple
Red & White = Strawberry
Black & Orange = Grape
Orange & Yellow = Orange

On my trip, there were only two snake flavors available so I'll keep an eye out for other varieties (more shopping? Why, it's research for my blog... really Dear!).

I also found Halloween Gummy Tape Worms from Kandy Kastle. Two tasty gummy worms in one pack. I didn't see varieties of this pack but inside my pack were an orange worm that tasted like orange and a green worm that tasted like lime. Each flavor worm can be pulled independently of the other so you could just eat your favorite or share with a friend (or fiend).

Ben & Jerry's New Flavor

2008-09-24T19:12:00.002-04:00

Get some before it's fall gone.

Ch- Ch- Ch- Changes

2008-09-14T21:08:00.005-04:00

You know how sometimes you get a really great idea about something in the middle of the night or during a dream and you don't take the time to write it down thinking, "This is so amazing I could never forget something like this." Then the next time you're thinking about that particular thing it seems so much less amazing and you wish like crazy you could recall your exact original idea? Well that's where I'm. Full of all kinds of great dreams and ideas and no time to stop and write them all down.

Over the summer I decided to leave the bakery and go back to working full time in a factory. Prior to my Pastry and Cake work I was a Quality Inspector for various types of factory-made products. Currently, it's electronic circuit boards.

My decision to leave the bakery was not an easy one. I still very much love the hustle of the kitchen environment. Thankfully, one of my Bakery Managers has enough heart to keep me and allows me come in and play around with the cakes on occasion. It's tough cutting back though. I still have that itch to bake and create. I guess my new co-workers and my blog readers will be the beneficiaries of my creative outlet.

I have been getting back up to speed with my fellow bloggers (because losing my old computer with all the great blog links really stunk) and I see some of them are going through changes as well. Change can be a good thing. How boring would we be if we we never changed, eh? A long time ago, a really smart man I knew had a plaque on his wall that read, "Do what you've always done and you'll get what you've always got." I try to remind myself of this when something changes that I'm not yet prepared to face.

With all this said, I hope you're assured this goofy blog will continue on, until that changes too. Baking, cooking, a little gardening sometimes, and lots of silly, crazy, edible stuff I find around the Internet or in my local dollar store will continue to trickle in here. Oh, and don't forget, Halloween is right around the corner. I hope to share some of that with you too.

Thanks for reading here. I'll try to keep it up.

Halloween Stinks

2008-08-23T13:40:00.000-04:00

Get in the mood early.

Halloween fragrance by Jesus Del Pozo at drugstore.com

Sweet Cinnamon Pumpkin Shower Gel at Bath & Body Works

Halloween Bath Set from Colorful Images.com

A message to the Googler from Antioch, California...
Gummy Fetus candy? I like your thinnin' Baba Louie but it doesn't seem to have been invented yet. Why? Cuz it's really sick to want to eat a fetus. Even a candy one.
Other baby-theme candies to try:
Baby Bottle Pop
Sugar Babies
Lollipops in the shape of baby feet
Cry Baby gumballs
Gummy Sea Babies
Licorice Babies
Chocolate Babies (sic)
Baby Stick Climbers
and a product I'm not familiar with: Baby Lucas Candy from Mexico in flavors of Mango, Spicy Orange and Chamoy (Isn't that what I dry my car with after a wash?)

I have answered a question about storing Confectioner's Sugar at Ask a Pastry Chef

Rey Mysterio Jr. Cherry Jalapeno Cup Cake

2008-08-15T09:33:00.005-04:00

Rey Mysterio Jr. is a spicy little cupcake doing the famous 619 move. I’ve made a spicy cup cake in his honor.

In order to fulfill my personal tall order of creating a dessert or cupcake to meet the requirements of two very different contests, I had to do some fancy thinkin’. The Bake-off hosted by Bake & Destroy had a very tight deadline. In trying to break my blogger’s block I probably needed the tight deadline to keep myself on track and not procrastinate as I’m prone to do [ahem] once in a while.

So here are the rules I needed to follow:
Slush, the creator of the contest Cupcake Hero says,” While I am still on Cupcake Hero hiatus, we have 2 very cool hosts for the month. Rachel of Tangerine Tart and Teri of the 90/10 rule. I am always super excited to see what other people will chose as the theme. To say that I raised an eyebrow when I read the email with their choice would be completely accurate. I seriously thought, huh?? However, the Hero isnt meant to be easy. I give you the theme ingredient for August…Jalapeno
So here’s the deal–
*You must incorporate jalapeños in your entry.
*You may use jalapeños in any form.
*Sweet cupcakes only, no savory. (sorry, Bacon-Cheddar-Jalapeño-Salsa-Cornbread variations) “
Bake & Destroy’s Sugar Slam! The sweetest wrestling-themed bake-off on the entire Internet. Yeah. In your face, other baking contests! Create a wrestling-themed dessert that entertains me and you win.
Um, that’s all. I don’t really like rules. If it’s sugary and wrestling-themed it’s eligible.

I hope that Rachel and Teri don’t think it’s cheating to use a box cake mix. I’m normally really a stickler for making everything from scratch but I have never tried to convert the list of dry ingredients in my vanilla cake into a box-mix format. Perhaps that can be for another blog. I also hope they don’t realize that what I have made is Dump Cake in a cup. SHHhhhhh

The Recipe

Cherry Jalapeno Cup Cake

2 Pounds Bing cherries, pitted & chopped
1/2 Cup granulated sugar
1 1/2 Cup water
2 Tablespoons lemon juice

Bring to a boil over medium heat then continue cooking until the liquid is reduced by half, about 40 minutes.

Then add
¼ teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon ground allspice
¼ Cup Jalapeno jam*

Remove from heat and stir in
¼ Cup Kirsch or other cherry brandy

Divide the cherry mixture among 4 large café cups.

Blend
1 stick salted butter, melted
1 box yellow cake mix
Sprinkle over the top of the cherry mixture then sprinkle
¾ Cup slivered almonds, if desired

Place the filled cups in a water bath and bake at 325 degrees for about 50 minutes, or until the topping becomes golden brown.

Ceramic cups are typically not oven safe however, placing the cups in a water bath protects them from heating too quickly which can cause cracking or shattering. Place the filled cups in a baking pan then place the whole works on the oven shelf then fill the baking pan with hot water then carefully slide it to the middle of the oven. I’ve seen this done before but was still quite nervous about it. You can see the cups fared just fine.

Be very careful when taking the pan out of the oven after baking. Not much water evaporates during baking and 350 degree water is really hot, if you didn’t already figure that out.

*I used only ¼ cup of the Jalapeno jam in my filling because I wanted a little heat but if you’re really into hot stuff, add whatever amount suits your taste. I bought the jam at my local Amish Farmer’s market and the ingredients are: Red peppers, sugar, corn syrup, Jalapeno peppers, water, distilled vinegar, salt, pectin, citric acid. Straight out of the jar it is spicy but still a bit sweet.

The cherries and spices of this dish marry surprisingly well with the Jalapeno. When you’re looking for a summer dessert to bring to the neighborhood Mexican-themed block party, double the filling and place it in a 9x13 cake pan. Sprinkle on the cake mix, drizzle with melted butter, almonds and bake for 25 minutes. Arriba!

Technorati tags bakery+cherry+Jalapeno+cupcake+food

Grommie Returns

2008-08-12T05:47:00.002-04:00

Mwahaha... [creepy music]

Rather than bore you with a lot of blather about where I've been and why all two of my adoring fans should continue reading here I'll tantalize you the promise of a new recipe in the next couple of days.

I'm trying to make it under the dead (get it? dead) line for a couple of interesting baking competitions I found.

One from Cupcake Hero (I've entered Slush's contests before).

One from Bake & Destroy.

Check them out and see if you can imagine how I will work those contests into one big tasty concoction. Then come back to see what I actually came up with.

Funky Kraut

2008-06-29T11:16:00.002-04:00

Whew! This space is beyond funky with that sauerkraut hanging around for months on end.

Watch for updates coming very soon! Promise.

Sauerkraut Website

2008-02-12T20:09:00.000-05:00

http://www.sauerkrautrecipes.com/

This website has lots of tasty sauerkaut recipes... including desserts!
Got a sauerkraut recipe to share? Send it to them and they may publish your recipe.

I've been working hard testing chocolate icing recipes and I'll be getting those results up soon at: Ask a Pastry Chef

Technorati tags sauerkraut+weird food+German

Cheese Curds. Yes, again

2007-12-08T22:23:00.000-05:00

where cheese curds come from

I realized after re-reading my post, Curds are King in July I didn't actually tell you where to get the best cheese curds. They can be found at the Ellsworth, Wisconsin Co-op Creamery. If you click the link, they have the creamery's history as well as a link to order (they ship anywhere is the US) and a phone number in case you want to call and talk about those chocolate cheese curds they mention on their website. When you call, be sure to listen for the lovely Wisconsin accent, yaa!

As long as we're on the subject of cheese I'll tell you also about Wisconsin Cheese Mart. Go to them for all your other cheese needs. Chocolate cheese (it's becoming a trend!), cheese in the shape of a mug of beer, cheese in the shape of a cow, or if you just can't decide which cheese is best, one of these

multi-cheese

The WCM website is packed with cheese info. like, how long your cheeses can be stored, the proper temperature, and what can be done with cheese that has become moldy. WCM also has a wonderful German Foods (Deutches Essen) section: mustards, muesli, cookies, spaetzle. The only thing I might pass up would be the Celery Salad. Product Description: This fine sour salad of Hengstenberg is and easy Snack alternative for in between meals.

That's ok, everyone knows cheese is the only snack alternative that's worth mentioning.

Technorati tags cheese+Ellsworth Creamery+German+cheese curds+food+Wisconsin Cheese Mart

Bacon Chocolate Bar and Bacon Extras

2007-12-01T09:20:00.000-05:00

I first heard about bacon infused chocolate at Food Chronicles ~ Back of the House. I was instantly intrigued, as I'm sure you are!

I read more about it here.
Their sentiments are mine exactly: the mad, dangerous, lovely chocolatiers of Vosges Haute Chocolat have seen fit to bestow upon the world a bacon candy bar.

Yes, you read that correctly.

Said bar consists of applewood smoked bacon, alder smoked salt, deep milk chocolate, and the contents of every fever dream I've had since young girlhood.

The Bacon Exotic Candy Bar is currently sold out on the Vosges website, but I, for one fully intend to press my nose up against my monitor until they're back in stock.

That blog also features a few more stories on lovely bacon flavored foods (i.e. bacon cotton candy!) so check them out.

A blog named Holy Shitake has a bacon post that requires mentioning because I have been thinking about this recipe since I first read it two years ago.

Okay well, as long as I'm on a bacon roll, I give you this website. Weird Meat "documents experiences eating strange food, as I travel around the world. What is weird to one, is normal to another. I want to find out why. Includes articles, travel stories, photos." Some highlights from weird meat (and I assure you I found no low lights) include Deep Fried Sand Worms in China and Hermaphrodite Frog Guts (he explains it's like a sweet soup) also in China. There are many more foods and many more countries and just so you know, this blog spurred me to purchase Crocodile Jerky on my recent trip to Florida though I haven't yet been brave enough to try it. True, WeirdMeat Blog doesn't include bacon so what is it doing as part of this post? I have no idea, so there.

I'm a little tired, so sue me.

Technorati tags bacon+chocolate+weird food+Weird Meat+food+candy

November's Cupcake Hero: Cranberry

2007-11-29T06:06:00.000-05:00

Cupcake Hero is the fun, current obsession of slush at quirky cupcake. Apparently I have been missing out on a Blog Challenge that is right up my alley*. I needed to get back to baking on a grander scale (meaning, I'm getting bored with baking the same cakes day after week at the W-place) and this is a cupcake fanatic's dream come true! slush does all the work coming up with a theme and all I have to do is hop on that bandwagon and ride it all the way to Tasty Town.

slush: Now if your new to Cupcake Hero, each month a theme ingredient is named. The theme ingredient must be used in either the cupcake, the frosting, the filling or all of the above if you choose. Come on, it doesnt get easier than that, you know your going to be baking anyway!

The theme ingredient for November is: CRANBERRY

If you want to participate, send your cupcakery to superslush AT gmail.com by November 30.

Name
Your blog name and URL*
Link to your Cupcake Hero entry
Picture of your cupcakery (200 to 250 width is preferred)
Remember: The theme ingredient, cranberry, must be used in the cake, frosting or filling.

I heard about this event just in the nick of time on IMBB.

Cranberry Hero: Grommie Style

Pumpkin Cupcakes Studded with Cranberries

3 oz. sweetened, dried cranberries
1 cup orange juice
2 teaspoons cinnamon, divided
9 oz. unsalted butter (2 sticks plus 1 tablespoon)
15 oz. light brown sugar
0.25 oz. salt (2 large pinches)
15 oz. cake flour
2 teaspons baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
3 whole eggs
2 egg whites
2/3 cup pumpkin puree (not pumpkin pie mix)
1 1/4 cup applesauce (pref. Granny Smith or homemade)
1/3 cup milk

Preheat the oven to 385 degrees. Place the dried cranberries, orange juice and 1/2 teaspoon of the cinnamon in a small sauce pan. Simmer gently until orange juice is reduced by half (12 - 15 minutes) and cranberries are very plump. Let cool slightly.
Cream butter and brown sugar until light and fluffy. Combine dry ingredients: salt, cake flour, baking powder, baking soda, remaining cinnamon, and nutmeg. Set aside. To the creamed mixture, add eggs and egg whites and beat well. Scrape the bowl and beat again. Gently mix in 1/3 of the dry ingredients and add the pumpkin and applesauce. Mix in another 1/3 of the dry ingredients, then the milk and the remaining dry ingredients. Then gently mix in the reconstituted cranberries and reduced orange juice.
Fill baking cups to 2/3 full and bake 18 to 20 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean.
Cool and brush tops with No Sugar Added cranberry juice. Top with Cranberry Spice Buttercream (recipe below) and garnish with dried cranberries.

Cranberry Spice Buttercream

1/2 cup No Sugar Added cranberry juice
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
3/4 cup pasteurized egg whites (Whippin’ Whites or Eggology),
warmed to room temp.
1 pound unsalted butter, softened and cut into pieces
A quick splash of vanilla extract
2 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice
3 drops neon pink food color

In a small cooking pot, stir together juice and sugar. Bring to a boil and using a pastry brush and water, wash down the sides of pan to remove any crystals. Do NOT stir again.

Boil 4 minutes then beat egg whites to stiff peaks.
With the mixer running, slowly pour the cooked syrup into the whites.
Beat at high speed until the bowl is cool to the touch (about 10 minutes).
Slowly add the butter and vanilla. Beat until light and fluffy. Then add the pumpkin pie spice and food color.

This is a very mild-flavored cupcake and kind of a nice change after all of the bold flavors of Thanksgiving. If my stomach wouldn't protest, I could easily eat 3 or 4 of these at a time.

Originally, I was thinking of using a Brown Sugar Icing that I found here. However, I never did get the hang of this icing and fell back on my old stand-by, Buttercream. If you're not up to the challenge of making your own Buttercream, just mix up a batch of American Buttercream and in place of the milk, use the cranberry juice I mentioned.

*I'm great at thinking up recipes but suffer to think up a reason to bake them (dopey, huh?!?) now I just need to find someone to eat them all.

Technorati tags Cupcake Hero+challenge+cupcake+cranberry+food+cake

Q and A -- Gritwurst

2007-11-12T18:40:00.000-05:00

Normally, I save my Q and A for the Ask A Pastry Chef blog however, since this question has more to do with meat than pastry, I'll post it here.

A question from Ankeny, Iowa via Google search: How do you make Gritwurst?

Unless you are of German heritage and have a background of farm living, you're probably not familiar with Gritwurst. I am lucky to be of German heritage and to have family that grew up in the country where they used every part of an animal and learned to enjoy such delicacies. Despite some descriptions, Gritwurst (sometimes known as Gritzwurst or Grutzwurst) is not head cheese, though both are made with meat from the hog's head.

I will admit I have never tried Gritwurst though in my defense, it has been quite a number of years since I have been around when my family has made it. After re-reading the recipe I think it actually sounds kind of tasty. I would have to make alterations of course unless I can create a list of reasons to invest in a meat grinder.

Here is my Great Grandmother's recipe with some clarifications,

Gritwurst

9 to 10 pounds hog's head meat (pork shoulder or roast may be used instead of head)
4 to 5 pounds steel cut oats
1 heaping tablespoon pepper
1 1/2 tablespoons allspice
1 1/2 tablespoons cinnamon
3 to 4 tablespoons salt

In a large cooking pot, cover meat with water and cook about 2 hours. Add some salt while cooking. Remove meat from the pot and strain stock. Cool slightly and remove meat from the bones and grind meat. Return the strained stock to a boil and add oats. Steam until soft and thick. Mix in spices and ground meat. Form the mixture into patties or place in a large cake pan or roaster and allow to cool overnight then cut into squares. Fry patties or squares in a bit of oil.

Gritwurst is often eaten for breakfast and according to my mother and aunties it's best when crispy.

I have a cookbook with recipes from the Depression Era which contains a recipe for Venison Gritwurst. It is basically the same with half of the pork replaced with venison. Additionally, marjoram, thyme, and allspice are added in place of the cinnamon, etc. This recipe says the they can be served with jelly, honey or pancake syrup, as a sandwich filling or side dish at any meal.

Patties or squares can be wrapped tightly and frozen before frying.

I called my mother before posting this and she excitedly asked if I was going to make Gritwurst! I may... and I may let her help.

Update: In an email from one of my aunties, "Thanks for sending me to your blog. Yup. I had not looked for a while so it was fun to catch up. I just have a couple of comments on the gritwurst. The last times I made it I had the butcher grind up the pork for me and justcooked it like ground beef for sloppy joes. It made the whole thing very simple and also made it easy to drain off much of the fat. When I cook itfor eating, I just throw it in a pan loose and brown it good. I, too, like it crispy but it is greasy. It is really important to use steelcut oats.They can be found in health food stores if nowhere else. Makes me think I need to whip up a batch."

Technorati tags German cooking+pork+venison+scrapple+food+Depression Era

Caught on the Green Carpet

2007-11-05T13:52:00.000-05:00

Even though creating 400 desserts for the Girl Scouts Green Carpet event seemed like a daunting task when I thought about it as a whole, once I broke it down into its parts: testing several recipes to see which was the easiest to perform and the best tasting, computing the total amount of ingredients I would need to reach completion, buying the ingredients and table decorations (this was the killer! as the whole event was a donation), making and canning the Fabulous Lady Applesauce, mixing and baking the Apple Dancers Cupcakes, mixing and icing with the Peanut Butter Buttercream, arriving at the Green Carpet event on time and setting up my table to serve the 400 curious guests... it was quite uh, I won't say fun because it was too much work to really be fun but it was certainly something I could do again. If asked by the Girl Scouts to do it again, I would likely say, 'no' simply because of the cost.

I do have to give a giant Thank You to Girl Scout Mom, Sally for stepping up to help me bake the cupcakes. With her help, I was able to mix the batter, fill and bake the cupcakes and get them boxed, waiting to be iced in 6 hours. My workplace was mighty generous in allowing us to bake and store the cupcakes until the event also.

Before I launch into the recipes, let me describe the cupcakes a little. They are made with homemade applesause, cinnamon, and crushed Do-si-dos Girl Scout Cookies as well as a whole Do-si-do hidden in the middle of the cupcake. Upon baking, the whole Do-si-do (which is the oatmeal and peanut butter sandwich cookie) becomes softened just a little bit... enough so it isn't a crunch when biting through the cupcake but it doesn't dissolve either. I topped the cupcake with a light Peanut Butter Buttercream. I didn't want the delicate flavor of the applesauce and cinnamon of the cupcake to be completely masked by overpowering PB.

When I wrote the recipes to be submitted to Girl Scouts, I knew they would be printed for everyone attending the event so I wanted the recipes to be simple enough for folks who loved the cupcakes but don't necessarily have the time, energy, patience to make everything from scratch so shortcuts are listed in the recipe.

Apple Dancers Cupcakes

2 sticks (1/2 lb.) plus 2 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
2 1/3 cups packed light brown sugar
1 teaspoon salt
4 whole eggs
1 egg white
3 1/2 cups cake flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 1/2 teaspoons cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
1 1/2 cups Lady Apple sauce (recipe follows)
1 1/2 cups milk
2 boxes plus 6 additional Do-Si-Do (Peanut Butter Sandwich) Girl Scout Cookies, divided

Preheat oven to 375 degrees and prepare muffin pans with 48 paper baking cups.

Crush 6 Do-Si-Do Girl Scout Cookies to very fine crumbs then add flour, salt, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, and nutmeg; stir to combine and set aside. Cream the butter and brown sugar until light and fluffy. Scrape the bowl and add eggs. Stir in half of the dry mixture then add the Lady Apple sauce (or pre-packaged, unsweetened Granny Smith apple sauce). Add remaining dry ingredients and milk. Mix gently until just combined.

Place one tablespoon of cake batter into the bottom of each baking cup. Top with 1 whole Do-Si-Do Girl Scout Cookie. Fill baking cup to 2/3 full with remaining batter.

Bake 15 to 20 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out with a few moist crumbs. Allow cupcakes to cool in the pan.

When cupcakes are cool, top with 2 tubs of vanilla frosting mixed with 3/4 cup creamy peanut butter or use your stand mixer to make real Peanut Butter Buttercream (recipe follows).

Makes 48 cupcakes.

Peanut Butter Buttercream

Scant 1/2 cup water
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
3/4 cup pasteurized egg whites (Whippin’ Whites or Eggology),
warmed to room temp.
1 pound unsalted butter, softened and cut into pieces
1 cup creamy peanut butter

In a small cooking pot, stir together water and sugar. Bring to a boil and using a pastry brush and water, wash down the sides of pan to remove any crystals. Do NOT stir again.

Boil 4 minutes then beat egg whites to stiff peaks.
With the mixer running, slowly pour the syrup into the whites.
Beat at high speed until the bowl is cool to the touch (about 10 minutes).
Slowly add the butter and then the peanut butter. Beat until light and fluffy.

Fabulous Lady Apple Sauce

6 Pink Lady Apples
2 or 3 Granny Smith Apples
1/4 cup Unsweetened Apple Juice

Slice each apple into 6 or 8 pieces (no need to peel or core apples) and place into a 4 quart cooking pot with a lid. Add apple juice and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to medium and cover. Simmer, stirring occasionally until apples are very soft. Remove from heat and let cool slightly. (For the next part you need a food mill. You can still find them in most kitchenware stores and they are not too expensive.) Place the food mill over a large bowl that will hold it steady. Spoon the apple mush into the mill and turn it, pushing the pulp through the mill as you turn, once in a while giving the crank a backward spin. Keep turning the mill until you get all the pulp out of the apple skins and they look dry in the bottom of the mill; this is what makes your sauce thick. You may need to scrape the sides of the food mill once or twice with a rubber spatula, and scrape underneath at the very end.

This is a very healthy treat and it tastes better than any packaged applesauce you’ve ever tried and it’s easier than it sounds!

Store covered in the refrigerator. (I processed mine the old fashioned way.)
Makes 2 pints.

Here are more photos of the event. Some are mine and some are from the Girl Scouts website.

Here is CheesePuff and my table set up at the event. This girl deserves a medal for how patient she was with me stressing-out during setup. (note how frightened she looks)

Green Carpet sponsors

The most important sponsor (if you can't quite read it, it lists me as Fabulous CheeseBabe!)

All the chefs from the event.
That's me in front of Duff Goldman from Ace of Cakes. His Food Network TV crew was with him throughout the event and portions of the event may appear on a show in January. I doubt they filmed me at any point.

A few more if you're really into looking at me....
Puff and CheeseBabe
At work
Throng of people looking for cupcakes.

Technorati tags Girl Scout+cupcake+Duff Goldman+cookies+food+celebrations

Girl Scouts Cupcakes

2007-10-29T13:56:00.001-04:00

Apple Dancers Cupcake
Originally uploaded by Grommie CheeseBabe

The Girl Scouts of Central Maryland called me a few months back and asked if I would be interested in creating a dessert using Girl Scout Cookies for a Green Carpet (similar to a Red Carpet in Hollywood, but with Girl Scouts it's all green green green) Event. Of course I was excited to help out the Girl Scouts and as for creating something new?... of course that would be fun for me! They told me that they would send me boxes of Girl Scout cookies to test with and more information later. Cool! I thought.

Then I began to receive information about the Green Carpet Event (it wasn't something I was familiar with previously) and I find out that the event is for 400 people. Uh... ok... I'm thinking maybe they have Pastry Chefs from all over the area participating and I'll only have to send in a few dozen of whatever dessert I decide upon.

Oh no.

No, they need me to supply an entire 400 individual servings so that each person will be able to taste every dessert if they want. Not only that but I also need to have decorations to go along with their theme of 'Hollywood Glamor'.

After much planning, testing and cookie tasting, I came up with the loveliest apple and peanut butter cupcakes you could possibly imagine. Costly? For a large event as this, yes, but I am one who subscribes to the thought that when you use the highest quality ingredients, you're going to acheive the highest quality product. The cupcakes that I served to those Green Carpet guests will not soon be forgotten.

I was told during the event that my cupcakes were definitely the highlight. I hope that's true for many of the folks in attendance and I hope this cupcake is the start of my next career move (if any!).

Recipes to follow

Curds are king in July

2007-07-28T09:35:00.000-04:00

Finally, a month for cheese curd fans to call their own.

The Wisconsin Milk Marketing Board (WMMB) has unofficially declared July as curd month. It’s gratifying to realize what has sometimes been described as the lowly curd is getting high-level recognition, at long last. A recent WMMB news release about the announcement appropriately uses words like “delicious” and acknowledges “the insatiable appetite locals have for these delectable treats…”

But the praise falls a bit short. The promotional agency apparently regards cheese curds as a “regional delicacy” or a “Wisconsin craze.” Those in-the-know would argue their popularity extends beyond Dairyland’s borders. Just ask officials from the Ellsworth Co-op Creamery or Kaufhold’s Kurds here to learn the two businesses’ curd products are gaining a more widespread reputation, even nationally.

And that brings to mind another slight in the release. Nowhere does it credit Ellsworth as the “Cheese Curd Capital,” a place right on home turf deserving of a salute for shining the spotlight on curds. Although the WMMB boasts a curd guide on the website , which details where to find fresh curds on a map, that leaves the local community little more than another blip on curd seekers’ radar.

Agency leaders are evidently coming from a different perspective than the curd capital faithful. They find it necessary in the release to explain cheese curds are “about the size of shell peanuts. They’re available in plain or flavored varieties and feature a mild, milky, salty flavor with the same firmness as mild Cheddar cheese, but with a more springy texture.

“Ideally, curds are eaten when fresh—within hours of manufacture. Fresh cheese curds can be identified by their ‘squeak’ against the teeth when chewed and are often referred to as ‘squeaky cheese.’ Curds that are a couple of days old are considered ‘aged’ and might have lost their squeak. For a temporary ‘squeak renewal,’ simply heat your curds in a microwave for a couple of seconds…”

“Their slightly salty flavor make Wisconsin cheese curds an excellent accompaniment to pale ales and lagers, or to popular snacking favorites such as pretzels and nuts. Cheese curds can also be used in place of cubed cheese atop salads or alternated on skewers with fresh fruit for fun summertime kabobs.”

So others are discovering what this area’s natives have long known about the tiny, but mighty curds, and that’s a positive development. Hopefully, their newfound enthusiasm will bring a bigger following into the fold. If all of dairying can be proud of a traditional month-long tribute in June, backers of the little cheese curd-that-could can certainly do likewise in July.

*From the Pierce County Herald

Technorati tags cheese+curd+Wisconsin+Pierce County+food

Tasty Local Fare

2007-04-16T20:30:00.000-04:00

It seems like everybody is on the Eat Local bandwagon these days. I live in the suburbs so eating locally mostly means eating what I'm able grow in my own little garden.

Future Harvest is helping out folks like myself who would like to learn more about the food produced in the Chesapeake Bay Area.

A Taste of Spring

Join us for an evening of fresh, locally grown food, brought to you by Maryland and Virginia farmers who have embraced environmentally sound methods.

• Fine foods prepared by Baltimore chefs John Shields of Gertrude's and Ned Atwater of Atwater's Bakery

• Local wine from Maryland’s oldest winery, Boordy Vineyard

• Local farmers discussing the benefits of eating locally and their keys to success

• The musical stylings of Todd Clewell and Barb Schmid, members of the trio, Late for Supper. Clewell, from Felton, Pa., sings and plays guitar, mandolin and fiddle; Schmid, of Hampstead, Md., plays fiddle and sings. Together, they perform bluegrass, folk, 50's, originals, gospel and more.

• An auction of unusual food and farm-related items

Help support local farmers as well as Future Harvest! Don’t miss our Taste of Spring fund-raising event at Boordy Vineyard in Baltimore County, Md. We'll showcase the efforts of area farmers in a festive celebration of spring!

Tickets cost $45 and will go on sale in mid-April.

Taste of Spring

6 to 9 p.m., Thursday, May 31

Boordy Vineyard, 12820 Long Green Pike, Hydes, Md.

Bakery News

2007-01-20T10:50:00.000-05:00

The holidays are over and New Years' resolutions are kicking in and out all over. Business at the bakery has been slow due to Diet resolutions and after a busy holiday season, a little slowdown is welcome. If history repeats itself, the next couple of weeks will see local folks slowly coming off their diets and indulging in chocolate cakes through Valentine's Day, after which we will gear up for Easter.

Historically, before we are fully enmeshed in chocolate ganache cakes (doesn't that sound like fun??) we have at least one full week where customers are clamoring for carrot cake. Nevermind that our carrot cakes are slathered with cream cheese icing, those carrots are healthy, right? Isn't it amazing what we can convince ourselves of as being healthy?

I learned a long time ago not to make New Year's resolutions since I never keep them anyway. However, despite not making formal resolutions, I often think there are things about myself that I could and should improve, particularly after the holiday season indulgences I can usually stand to eat healthier and hopefully lose a little girth in the process. That in mind, don't expect to see any new gross candy reviews, at least for a little while (they're still lurking around, believe me). I also realize that with all of my personal health concerns, eating a balanced diet and exercising semi-regularly makes me feel better and I have more energy so I'm not doing things like falling alseep in the car while waiting for CheesePuff to emerge from school.

I know there are a lot of folks out there who love reading diet blogs but I'm not one of them and I don't wish to write a diet blog (how many different ways could I write about a green salad with fat free dressing, anyway?). I will however, share future food adventures that I feel are tasty and interesting enough to write about.

Two foods I tried recently that fit in with this new, healthier eating plan include Cedar's Taboule (some folks call it, tabbouleh) and Kashi Cinnamon Harvest cereal.

My biggest food weakness is for dips and snack foods. I tried Cedar's Taboule with Stacy's Pita chips (though I have to be careful and only allow myself a small portion of the chips because I can eat the whole bag). This satisfies my snack craving and keeps me away from the more oil-laden snack chips. As an alternative, I also mix in 1/4 of cubed avocado to the Taboule for added healthy fats.

Kashi is dedicated to improving the way we eat and I have been very impressed with the Kashi foods I've tried. You can visit Kashi's website to learn more about them and join their community to win Kashi food products. A year's supply of free food? I'm in!

Wide Awake With Jones Soda -- Dessert Pack

2006-12-18T04:06:00.000-05:00

I have been taking this long winter's nap thing waaaaaay too seriously. After two weeks of nodding off in the car (not while driving, sillies!) waiting for CheesePuff to get out of school, nodding off for several hours in front of the TV before resigning to go to bed where I would sleep until the very last second and still feel tired through the day, I think I may have finally caught up. At least, in sleep. Now it's time to catch up with this blog thing.

Jones Soda Dessert Pack

While visiting family for Thanksgiving I was feeling brave and had hoped to find a Jones Soda Thanksgiving pack. I mean, what is family for if not to help you taste weird food?? You know you've done it... "Err... this tastes weird, here, try it!"
Sound familiar?

A trip to Target was my only opportunity to look for Jones (there was turkey-ing to be done, after all) and all I found was this Dessert Pack. Sheesh, all set to finally indulge in the weirdness of Jones Turkey and Gravy soda and I have to settle for Banana Cream Pie.

Jones mostly won me over not with flavors in the Dessert Pack, but the pack itself.

I love that it looks like a 1950's stove, complete with oven handle, top burner, and racy emblem.

The flavors in the Dessert Pack are interesting in their own right, I mean, who else has Key Lime Pie flavored soda or Banana Cream? But really, I was hoping for a little more weirdness... they couldn't come up with Pumpkin Pie or Mincemeat? Perhaps I should offer some suggestions. (Actually, I think they did have Pumpkin Pie as one of the Thanksgiving Pack flavors last year.)

The flavors to be found in the Jones Soda Dessert Pack are: Key Lime Pie, Banana Cream Pie, Apple Pie, Cherry Pie, and Blueberry Pie. Many of the flavors were a little watery and I think with a slightly stronger flavor, I would have been satisfied... with Blueberry Pie, especially.

Cherry Pie was the big loser of the pack with 3 thumbs down. It had a scent and taste of Marascino cherries, which as everyone knows, go on top of a sundae, not in pie. I think a standard cherry flavor soda would have been right. They missed the mark, here.

Apple Pie had a nice apple scent and was slightly tangy with no hint of vanilla or cinnamon (Coof thought she tasted nutmeg).

Banana Cream Pie had an artificial banana scent, which I happen to enjoy and a flavor similar to banana flavor taffy.

The big winner of the pack was Key Lime Pie. Virtually no scent but a nice tangy, true-to-life Key Lime Pie flavor. This too could have been slightly more powerful, but really enjoyable, overall.

Finally, as promised earlier, Santa on a Harley

Technorati tags Jones Soda+Thanksgiving+pie+gross candy+food

What's Going On?

2006-12-11T17:01:00.000-05:00

You may recall last year at this time I moaned and complained that there were simply not enough hours in the day to do everything I wanted to do (echoed recently in my Thanksgiving post). It is with a heavy heart that I must confess I've again swamped myself with projects and a completely illogical to do list. However, so that you all don't think I've abandoned you, I will offer an abbreviated listing of what's on my mind to tide you over until I can post in a more proper manner, with photos!

1. I made a multitude of Gingerbread Houses for CheesePuff's Brownie Troop and there were very happy girls.
2. Mr.G, the pickiest of all eaters, was fed Cornish Hen and liked it!
3. I still have gross candy reviews to share.
4. Elaborately painting a young girls' bedroom in a rush is a bad idea.
5. Paula Deen is trying to take over the world with bacon fat.
6. The producers of Sandra Lee's show need to stop her from making a complete fool of herself and tell her that chestnuts are not the same as water chestnuts.
7. My Thanksgiving trip was loads of fun, tasty, and we saw Santa on a Harley.
8. I'm really tired of cleaning my kitchen and throwing away food because of a pantry moth infestation... hopefully that's all cleared up now, but just to be safe, buy stock in Rubbermaid because I'm buying them up like crazy!
9. I had virtually no Thanksgiving cakes to decorate but my portfolio of Christmas/Winter/Hanukkah cakes are growing exponentially.
10. CheesePuff is learning to cook and has made Lasagna and an Apple Pastry braid.
11. It's barely the second week of December?!? I'm already due for a long winters' nap.

Technorati tags gingerbread+Sandra Lee+horror+gross candy+food+bacon fat

Giving Thanks

2006-11-19T07:22:00.000-05:00

Way back a year and a half ago I began reading blogs. Just one at first, the blog of a friend I knew from another venue. It was pretty cool. He talked about food and how to prepare food and his trials at culinary school and he had such pretty pictures! Then on his blog I found links to other blogs, most all of them about food. These people talking about food with their pretty photos all making me drooly and tickling my urge to cook. And cook I did.

Then it hit me. "Hey!" I said to myself, "I cook. I like to talk about food. I can figure out this digital camera-upload thing." So I began to blog. Sometimes talking about food or joining in food-related gatherings like IMBB, other times talking about goings-on in the garden or strange dreams I wanted to share. Eventually coming to this gross candy thing I'm doing now.

The more I think about my previous blog posts the more disjointed it all seems. Sort of the ADHD of blogging. Or maybe it's because I'm just so darn interested that it's hard to write about everything in a cohesive way. Interested. That's right, I said interested. Not interesting because that sounds braggish and I try not to be quite so self-absorbed. But how unself-absorbed can one be while blogging?

I read on another blog that to be really successful, one should blog daily. Is that right? I see a lot of blogs out there that are updated once a week or less. Do I really need to pressure myself to blog? Blogging should be one of those fun hobbies I employ, not a chore to be muddled through because I may have readers who have expectations. Do you have expectations? If I simply stopped blogging would anyone miss me? Of course there are some who would miss me and that's why I continue to blog in my disjointed, incohesive way.

Now that I have my what's my place in the blog universe questions of humanity out of the way, let's get to the thankful part. I'm beginning my Thanks Giving early because one of the things I'll be giving thanks for is a vacation to Florida which will hopefully keep me away from the PC or at least the rigors of blogging for a few days.

A short list for that which I'm Thankful:
Vacations where I don't have to spend a lot of money. You think I'm joking but I'm quite serious.
My family for all their weirdness, quirkyness, food adoration, spontaneity, light-heartedness and their ability to put up with all of these traits in me.
Stacy for being my friend all those years, hopefully she'll come around again one day and "Young Frankenstein".
Food Network for feeding my desire to learn to cook in those early days.
Other Bloggers for feeding my desire to read about food adventures beyond just looking at recipes.
Spam for never apologizing for what it is and never trying to be something else.
Marshmallow Peeps for being so darn cute and fun.
Dr. Seuss, Chuck Jones, and Boris Karloff for making "How The Grinch Stole Christmas" what it is.
Cows for giving milk, cheese, yogurt, and a comfortable, homey feeling when they are outstanding in their fields.
Breakfast cereal and Saturday Morning cartoons for helping me become the demented adult that I am.
Halloween for giving me an outlet for this adult dementia.
Alex Anderson for giving me the courage to charge ahead and make quilts even when I don't know what I'm doing.
Chico's for making clothes in sizes women want to wear. (zero to four!)
Festal Foods for publishing the best Pumpkin Pie recipe, ever.

And finally, again I'm thankful for my Family. They are my everything. If I had no job, no hobbies, no books they would be it. My joy, my laughter, my annoyance, my hope, my grief. All of them.

Now that we have all the mushy-gushy stuff out of the way, let's get back to the gross-out because I am, of course, thankful for that too.

Witches Brew Foaming Gum

Oriental Trading described it as Magical Mouth Foaming bubble gum. It has three distinct layers, the first layer is flavoring. The Green ball is Green Apple flavor with a nice green apple scent. The dark Purple ball is Grape. Below the flavored coating is the gum layer which has no remarkable flavor aside from that of typical bubble gum. Inside the gum layer is the foaming powder center. It has quite a bang of tangy citrus flavor (my mouth is watering now just thinking of it) with the promised foaming action, which lasted quite a long time and was very enjoyable.

I'm not normally a gum-chewer and I don't allow CheesePuff to have gum (though I know her step-sister sometimes sneaks it to her) so I didn't get her input but I really liked this gum. It also provides a decent bubble.

Count Blacula Bubble Gum

Another Oriental Trading find. I really like the white vampire face on the dark black gum ball. Unfortunately, that is about all I like about it. Neither the coating or the gum itself has a particulary good flavor. It is too sweet with chemical overtones from the coloring (which did give me a nice black tongue). The ball started out very hard to chew and as it softened, it simply got sticky then broke down and was never good for bubble-blowing. Quite a disappointment after the Witches Brew gum.

Skull Pops

Oriental Trading has a hit with this. A skull shaped lollipop with delicious vanilla flavor and a large amount of grape flavor Pop Rocks-style candy inside the pouch to dip the sucker into. I think the photo only shows a small amount of the popping candy compared to the amount I actually had in my pack.

Monster Hand Pops, Monster Head Pops and Mummy Pops

Three more from Oriental Trading. These are all basically the same pop in different shapes. A nice variety of fruit flavors. (I didn't taste one of each once I realized they were similar.) They are not a typical hard lollipop. The texture reminded me of the coating on Skittles. Quite tasty and very fun shapes.

A final word of Thanks to you, dear readers. Without you, none of this candy-tasting, cupcake-making, and yammering-on incessantly about it would be any fun at all.

Happy Thanksgiving. Save me some stuffing.

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+gross candy+food+Thanksgiving

Graveyard Ghoulees

2006-11-13T07:38:00.000-05:00

Graveyard Ghoulees Fruit Gummees by Juicee Gummee
That's a lot of 'ees.

These are nice soft gummies with a good chew and great flavors. Each spooky shape has its own flavor which I like a lot.
Bat - Strawberry
Skull - White Grape with Vanilla
Pumpkin - Orange
Spider - Purple Grape
Worm - Orange and Berry (or Watermelon?)

The large outer bag is much more fun than the individual bags, which was sort of a let-down. I visited the website and found a lot of fun gummy products (I'll be looking for the jelly-filled gummy cupcakes!) as well as a number of unusual food items. None of them had descriptions but I can guess that the items are marketed toward Hispanic folks.

This is a really good candy and I would definitely buy the smaller packs I found on the website but the giant Trick-orTreat pack wasn't as fun as I wanted it to be.

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+gross candy+food

Jones Soda -- Halloween Style

2006-11-05T14:41:00.000-05:00

Jones Soda, the company that brings us Thanksgiving in a bottle with flavors like Turkey & Gravy, Wild Herb Stuffing, and Brussels Sprout with Prosciutto has branched out to now include a few Halloween flavors. I haven't been brave enough to try the Thanksgiving flavors yet but the Halloween Flavors I found were not especially frightening.

My local Target carried 12-ounce bottles with various Halloween Theme photos on the label.
Monster Mojito was very sweet with a hint of mint.
Creepy Cranberry was really delicious. Slightly tangy cranberry flavor was very refreshing. CheesePuff thought it was sour but I didn't think so.
Lemon Drop Dead was much better over ice than straight out of the bottle. Out of the bottle I got a very odd lemon-rind flavor but this was reduced when I enjoyed it over ice. Slightly sour lemon flavor soda.

I received a few 8-ounce cans from Kadavar in Washington State. I don't think my Target carried these or they would have been in my stash.
Berried Alive was a sweet berry flavor that Puff & I both enjoyed (but neither of us enjoyed it enough to finish the can after tasting it).
Spider Cider tasted much like apple cider.
Candy Corn was the perfect Kid treat. Super sweet candy corn flavor that Puff loved. The soda was bright yellow in color and consequently, so were Puff's teeth afterward. A great addition to a frightful costume, if one desired.

I found out through the website that Jones makes a variety of other non-soda treats as well: Popsicles, Lip Balm and Carbonated Candy. The Carbonated Candy is a small disk, similar to a breath mint with freckles. It has a mild fizzy quality on the tongue that the label calls Tongue-Tingling Flavor Boosters and is slightly reminiscent of soda. The website says they can be dropped into Jones Soda so I tried a Fufu Berry candy in a small amount of my Lemon Drop Dead soda. It was an interesting change, but not enough to make me go out of my way to use up my candies this way and not enough to endure the length of time for the candy to dissolve in the soda.

We should expect to see the Thanksgiving Packs of Jones Soda out within the next week or so. Pick them up as soon as you see them. They are Limited Editions and only available for a short time during Thanksgiving.

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+gross candy+food+Jones soda

Happy Halloween!!!

2006-10-31T09:00:00.000-05:00

This is it... my big day. I have plenty of Candy surprises in store for the next few months but today I thought I'd offer some Tricks and Treats for your enjoyment.

10 Things That Sound Dirty on Halloween, but Aren't ...
1. So, What'd you get in the sack?
2. Once you get under the sheet, start moaning and groaning!!
3. Just hop on that broomstick and ride it!
4. Those small suckers are gone in a few licks!
5. I got the best piece from that house.
6. Quit screwing around on the porch!!
7. Stick your hand in and guess what you're feeling ...
8. It was so filled and heavy, I had to use TWO hands!!!
9. They'll suck you dry if they get their teeth in you.
10. I bobbed and bobbed, but couldn't get my mouth around it!!!

Why don't skeletons like parties? They have no BODY to dance with.

Why can't mummies go on vacation? They're afraid they'll relax and unwind!

Why did the ghost cross the road? To get to "THE OTHER SIDE"

What happens to a fast witch on a slow broom? She flies off the handle!

What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? Hoblin Goblin.

What happens when a ghost gets lost in a fog? He's mist!

Why couldn't the witch get pregnant? Her husband had a hollow weenie!

Why is Halloween a hillbilly's favorite holiday? Pump kin.

Top Ten Reasons Why Trick-or-Treating is Better Than Sex
10. You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.
9. If you get tired, wait ten minutes and go back at it again.
8. The stranger you look, the easier it is to get some.
7. You don't have to compliment the person who gave it to you.
6. The person you are with doesn't fantasize you're someone else, you already are.
5. If you get a stomach ache, it won't last nine months.
4. If you wear leather and chains, no one thinks you're kinky.
3. Doesn't matter if kids hear you moaning and groaning.
2. Less guilt the next morning from over-indulging.
1. If you don't get what you want at one place, you can always go next door to get more!!

Boo!

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+cake+food

Chef Ghoulicious Pantry of Candy

2006-10-29T01:47:00.000-05:00

One pantry item I forgot to get a photo of is Chef Ghoulicious Can of Worms: Squirmallicious Gummy Earthworms. These are similar to other gummy worms that I'm sure you have seen around. Ghoulicious worms have a tangy crystal sugar coating similar to that of Sour Patch Kids, but not as sour. The taste and texture of Ghoulicious Worms have a sort of foamy quality that remind me more of Marshmallow Peeps than other gummy worms. Eat Me Orange worms are orange flavor; Water Wiggler light pink worms, watermelon (tasted like strawberry to me); Very Scary Cherry dark pink worms, cherry flavor and chewier than other varieties. Overall, quite tasty.

Box of Boogers Tangy gummy Boogies that look & feel real!
Similar texture to the Gummy Earthworms. These are quite large and if they "look real" I'm afraid of their owner! Snottermelon dark green boogies are watermelon flavor; Sour Green Boogy light green boogies, green apple; Lemon Loogy yellow boogies, lemon-lime (these were the most tangy of the flavors and I liked them best). mmmm... Boogies!

AbbieNormal Bag of Brains Abnormally Large Gummy Brain! 'Candy That Tastes Smart' Similar again to Marshmallow Peeps without the sugar coating this time. These are about the size of a fist. Frontal Lobe Berry is blue raspberry; Water on the Brain is watermelon. The scents of these are very appealing and they have very strong fruit flavors.

These are made again by FLIX candy, the makers of Lip Pops and Projector Pops.

I would like to thank Kadavar of our Brainnn Candy Contest for sending me some of these items as well as other items I'll be reviewing soon.

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+gross candy+food

Fear Factor Candy

2006-10-28T07:48:00.000-04:00

Let's begin this disgusting romp through the candy world of Reality TV with the Sour Cherry Chuck Bucket. The package describes these as, "Gummy Coagulated Balls in Candy Blood Ooze" and warns, Proceed at Your Own Risk.

The little bucket contains two small packets; one contains the Coagulated Balls, the other bag contains the cherry Ooze. The package doesn't explain how these are to be combined but maybe the balls are to be placed in the bucket then the blood ooze is to be poured over them then given to your unsuspecting little sibling or nerdy neighbor to play your own version of Fear Factor at home.

The cherry Ooze was somewhat boring, barely any cherry flavor and was sort of oily in taste and texture. The Balls are very cherry-ish scented gummies. CheesePuff thought these were really good. I thought they had a stronger cherry flavor than the Ooze but still not all that great.

Test Tube Acid Bath is a gummy shape suspended in sour liquid candy. Sour Cherry flavor has a large gummy worm and Sour Blue Raspberry has a gummy shark. The gummies were not particularly gummy, I suppose they were beginning to dissolve a bit in the liquid. The liquid itself is tasty, sort of a refreshing sourness in the flavors described.

Here you can see a better photo of the Gross-out Gummy Platters. I've been eating candy for a long long time and I have eaten candies that I thought were not as tasty as I'd hoped they would be but those were no comparison to these platters.
The flavors available are:
Gummy Spaghetti: slimy candy worms with candy coagulated blood balls (flavors are lemon, lime and tropical fruit)
Gummy Breakfast: candy liquified liver, protein shake, duck egg and silk worm cereal (flavors are sour grape, strawberry, butter and chocolate)
Gummy Pig-out Platter: mmmm... pig parts (flavors are bacon and other amazing flavors)
I tasted the Gummy Pizza: crunchy candy fish eyes, worms and stinky cheese (flavors are cheddar cheese, lime, tomato and spicy pepperoni). I thought they were kidding about the stinky cheese but my taste buds told me otherwise. The candy chemists did their job well and I could not finish this candy. Cheesepuff took one sniff of it and ran away! I can't imagine what the other flavor combinations are like. The only all-fruit flavor looks like the Gummy Spaghetti and after tasting the Gummy Pizza, even the fruits have me a little leery of tasting any more of this candy.

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+gross candy+food

Battle of the Bugs -- Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters vs. Oriental Trading Crunchy Candy Bugs

2006-10-24T15:00:00.000-04:00

Oriental Trading Realistic Crunchy Candy Bugs come in two varieties as shown in the photo. These have a really great fruity aroma. The gummy body is tangy but not sour. I couldn't pick any specific fruit flavor, I would just describe it as fruit. The candy shell is slightly softer than a Necco Wafer but with approximately the same texture. The shell had a slight chemical taste, I presume from the food coloring used.

Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters have two in each package. These have a sweet aroma, more like sugar than fruit. The gummy body was sweet and tangy but not particularly fruity. The Roach wing covers have the same texture as O.T. Bugs with less chemical taste. HP Roaches did leave a brown smudge in the bottom of the package tray which added to the gross-out factor.

Severed thumbs up for both of these.

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+gross candy+food

Purple Cow -- Blueberry Cupcakes with Mascarpone Icicng

2006-10-23T06:39:00.000-04:00

"I never saw a Purple Cow Cupcake
'bet you never thought you'd see one
But I can tell you anyhow
I'd rather see than be one" (especially the hanging out in a 350 degree oven part -- YOWCH!)

Happy Birthday, Aunt Tossie!

Blueberry Cupcakes
2 cups unsalted butter
1 cup packed light brown sugar
2 eggs
1/2 cup milk
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 1/2 cups cake flour
2 cups fresh blueberries

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line 24 cupcake tins with baking papers. Place the butter in a microwavable bowl and microwave 1-2 minutes, just until melted but not boiling. Whisk in the brown sugar. Let cool to lukewqrm temperature, about 4 minutes.
Whisk the eggs into the butter-sugar mixture. Add the milk, vanilla, salt, and baking powder; whisk to combine. Whisk in the flour until just combined. Fold in the blueberries.
Fill each baking cup two-thirds full. Bake until a skewer inserted into the middle of a cupcake comes out clean, about 20 minutes.

This cupcake recipe is adapted from Sara Neumeier's book, Cupcakes Year-round. This book has great recipes but the format could use a bit of standardizing with a Table of Contents so that when I'm looking for a specific recipe, I don't have to flip through the entire book looking for it.

Mascarpone Icing
1/4 cup unsalted butter, softened
8 oz. Mascarpone cheese
1 tsp. vanilla
1 lb. powdered sugar

Beat butter until light and fluffy then add Mascarpone and vanilla and mix to combine. Scrape the mixing bowl thoroughly and slowly add powdered sugar.

This creamy Mascarpone icing is the perfect complement to the slightly tangy blueberry cupcake. I was pleasantly surprised that the cupcakes didn't taste as much like blueberry muffins as I had expected.

When I was a little tiny baby, my Aunt Tossie cared for me while my Mom went off to work in the coal mines at 3M. From the stories I've heard, it is only by small miracles that I survived the care of my dear Auntie. I know she loves me but expect to get such a pinch the next time she sees me. Everyone join me in whistling "Happy Birthday to You" and doing a birthday jig for Tossie.

Technorati tags candy+cupcake+birthday+purple cow+food

Jolly Rancher -- Frutas Enchiladas

2006-10-22T18:35:00.000-04:00

My Spanish is a little rusty... Fruit Enchiladas?

Tamarind, Lime and Mango flavor lollipops with a Spanish flair.

I bought these pops at my local Big Lots store in a Halloween multi-pack. I have seen Tamarind mentioned many times as a Hispanic sweet flavor and without reading the package carefully, I tossed a big bag of these babies in my cart. I figured I would give the Tamarind a try and if I didn't like it, there was always Lime or Mango flavors left to soothe my sweet tooth.

When I tasted the Tamarind pop, I was under the impression that the Tamarind itself was what made this pop spicy. After a big spicy surprise with the Lime pop, I read the ingredients list and each of the pops has chili powder.

Don't think I'm cruel here, but I let CheesePuff taste the Mango pop, because she is my taster-helper. Her reaction, "They ruined a perfectly good candy with chili powder!" That was pretty much my sentiments about these pops.

The Tamarindo flavor pop has a spicy, musky scent and a sweet, tangy and spicy flavor that I thought was really bizarre at first but it grew on me a little even though it was too spicy for me to finish.

Lime flavor was a really real Lime flavor, not "American" Lime candy flavor. Very enjoyable in a different kind of way.

Mango flavor pop has a slight of Mango aroma. I wouldn't say this has a true Mango flavor but it was still very good.

I can't imagine choosing these as a treat but they were fun to try anyway. Perhaps if I were hosting a Spanish-theme party, these would be a fun addition to a gift pack.

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+gross candy+food

Monster Lip Pops

2006-10-18T14:01:00.000-04:00

Finally found 'em.

The two on the left I found at Michael's Craft Store. The two on the right I found at Target. They have quite a different look don't they? I'm guessing that's Target's special packaging. Both are made by FLIX (the same company that makes the original Lip Pops). I did notice that the Target Pops were available in Green Apple as well as the Blue Raspberry and Watermelon flavors that I've found at Michael's. I haven't seen Green Apple in any of the Michael's Lip Pops.

I don't have a photo, but I also found some Halloween Projector Pops (I talked about those here). They have a lollipop similar to a Push-Pop and in the Pop handle there is a small lighbulb that shines a selected shape. I only found Pops with a ghost projection. The ghost image is kind of cool but at short distances (say, a few inches from a surface), otherwise it just becomes a red blob.

I believe I sent the Projector Pops along with the Brainnn Candy Prize Baskets so maybe one of our contestant-friends will let us know how the Pops tasted.

Happy Year-and-a-Half-iversary, Bloggity

2006-10-16T18:09:00.000-04:00

Since I totally flaked on Dear Bloggity's actual Anniversary date (April 16) because it was still tax season (the last tax day was actually April 18 this year in Maryland) and Mr.G was suffering through foot surgery... I decided to celebrate at the half-year instead. Because as we all know, my schedule is so uncluttered at this time of year. HA! So keep a watchful eyeball out for those gross candy posts... they're a-comin' I assure ya!

Brainnn Candy Contest -- The Final Countdown

2006-10-07T16:59:00.000-04:00

I don’t think our missing contestant is going to surface so let’s just hope she’s okay.

Yes we have a winner!
Three winners, actually… well heck, you’re all winners in my book!

Here are the answers for Round 3

1. Name the cracker company who for years had a recipe for Mock Apple Pie on the box back. (1 point)
Answer: Ritz Crackers (MrG found this recipe for me recently and I may have to surprise him with one of these tasty treats!)

2. Name the movie from 1966. Horrible acting and laughable special effects elevate this story of a family ensnared by a satanic cult a notch above your average bad horror film. Highlights include a Satan-like character who can’t stop laughing; the dreaded hounds of hell (or are those mangy dogs with big ears glued on?); and Torgo the monstrous henchman, who you know is evil because he has giant knee caps (a sure sign of the devil’s work). Yes, there’s even a catfight between gals in sheets! (2 points)
Answer: Manos: The Hands of Fate (Lordy what a treat this movie is!)

3. Fudgie the Whale is a versatile ice cream cake in the shape of a whale and was originally decorated as such, over the years the shape was adapted for holiday uses. The Easter Bunny could be depicted by using the whale's body as the face and the tail decorated to be his ears. Other characters, like leprechauns and Santa Claus were depicted in much the same way. Fudgie the Whale was often promoted around Father's Day, using the slogan, "For a whale of a dad." Name the ice cream company that developed Fudgie the Whale. (1 point)
Answer: Carvel (Remember a barely coherent Tom Carvel asking you to buy his ice cream cakes?? He must have been the idea man behind MrG’s favorite, Cookie O’ Puss.)

4. The first of these was built in 1936, and was 13 feet long. It cost $5000 to build, and was made in Chicago. The most recently built one is 27 feet long and seats 6. Its V-8 engine is definitely needed to power this thing, and looks like it not only needs lots of gas but could give you lots of gas too! What unique yellow and orange item is this? (2 points)
Answer: The Oscar Meyer Weinermobile

5. This West Point attendee is considered to have popularized detective fiction as well as creating poems and stories of a more macabre nature. A rose and a glass of Cognac are left on his grave every year by a mysterious fan. (1 point)
Answer: Edgar Allan Poe

6. Name the cool ghoul TV personality who performed autopsies on Jell-O. He also hosted a weekly horror movie show and recorded a song which cracked the US Top 10 chart in the 1950's. (1 point)
Answer: John Zacherle

7. This Hollywood legend plays a doctor brought back from the dead, kept alive by drinking human blood. This may be the first film character to pet white furry animals as an indicator of insanity. The white stripe in the hair was also a clue. Who is this actor/actress? (2 points)
Answer: Humphrey Bogart

8. Name the cartoon from the 1970's that featured Dracula, a Witch, a Werewolf and a Mummy living together in a haunted hotel cracking jokes and singing songs to warp little impressionable minds like mine. (1 point)
Answer: The Groovy Goolies and they all lived at Horrible Hall

Then we had the tie-breakers for the Prize Baskets

For Jademage and Food B*tch

1. Who is MrG.?
Answer: My husband
2. Who waits with CheesePuff while my cupcakes bake?
Answer: Jar Jar Binks
3. In which of the United States did I grow up?
Answer: Wisconsin
4. Guess the dollar amount, without going over, that I recently spent on gross candy at Oriental Trading Co.(closest dollar amount wins).
Answer: I’m afraid to tell you but JadeMage was closest (without going over) at $114.95
5. Since I don't get many Trick-or-Treaters, what will I be doing with all the gross candy from Oriental Trading that I can't possibly eat? Be specific.
Answer: Sorry, you folks are not getting this candy… I’m selling it on Ebay.

For Hauntedwoods and Kadavar

1. Who is CheesePuff?
Answer: my daughter
2. What is the name of the pinball machine in my basement that CheesePuff is playing in one blog photo?
Answer: Space Invaders
3. Which Brainnn Candy contestant is my mother?
Answer: Coof
4. Which other Brainnn Candy contestant is a blood relation to me?
Answer: AJTossie is my aunt
5. There are two other Brainnn Candy Contestants that I have met in person. Name one of them.
Answer: Mbabes and Talulah Bankhead

Round 3 had a total possible score of 11 Points while the tie-breaker round had a total possible score of 5 Points for each group.

Here are the final scores:

JadeMage -- 35 points (First Prize)
mbabes -- 27 points
miss lapin – 25 points
Talulah Bankhead -- 13 points
Coof -- 22 points
Food B*tch – 34 points (Second Prize)
Kadavar -- 30 points (Third Prize)
Hauntedwoods/Adam -- 29 points
Rabbitch -- 25 points
AJTossie -- 3 points

Does anyone recall the mystery prize I talked about at the beginning of the contest? We have a winner of that too! Our winner is AJTossie for all her smart-alleck guesses. Everything from Young Frankenstein being offered WD40 before retiring for bed, to Little Lulu Goes to Hawaii as an answer to the Groovy Goolies Q. Her Prize? (and this was MrG’s idea) Chocolate covered ants! Just what she always wanted.

Prize winners should be keeping an eye on their mail carriers for signs of gross candy sneaking for the next couple of weeks (hopefully no deliveries take that long!).

I want to thank you all for playing and for making this a lot of fun for me. From the emails I've received, it sounds as if you all had a lot of fun too.

I have a bunch of new gross candy to be reveiwed so keep a watchful gummy eye out for that.

Technorati tags candy+contest+horror+movies+food

Brainnn Candy Contest -- Round 4???

2006-10-01T13:10:00.000-04:00

I have had a wonderful time with this contest, compiling the questions and crossing my fingers that my clues would not make Googling those answers too easy. When I dreamed up this contest I had no idea how difficult you all would make it for me.

Currently, we have one contestant who has been with us all along and suddenly has not submitted answers. I'd like to just stall a little longer with the answers to Round 3 to give that last contestant a chance to get those answers in.

In the mean time, let me explain the title of this post. We have two contestants tied at First Place and two contestants tied at Second Place. Since I only have 3 Prize Baskets, we'll need to have a tie-breaking round. Jademage and Food B*tch are tied at 31 points each after Round 3. Hauntedwoods and Kadavar are tied at 28 points after Round 3. I will be posting questions to be answered by those four contestants only. Jademage and Food B*tch will receive one set of questions. The higher-score between those two will receive the First Place Prize Basket. The lower score between those two will receive the Second Place Prize Basket.
Hauntedwoods and Kadavar will receive a separate set of questions. The higher score between those two will receive the Third Place Prize Basket. Now, be prepared you four. These will be obscure questions that will most likely be guessing unless you read my blog and can recall tidbits of my personal life that have shown up here.

Each question will be worth one point.
Email me your answers at brainnncandy@yahoo.com
I will post scores as your emails come in (in pairs). Changing answers will not be allowed. You get one shot. Answers posted in the comments section will be disqualified. Here we go. Hopefully we can hash this out in one final round so we won't need to do this again.

For Jademage and Food B*tch

1. Who is MrG.?
2. Who waits with CheesePuff while my cupcakes bake?
3. In which of the United States did I grow up?
4. Guess the dollar amount, without going over, that I recently spent on gross candy at Oriental Trading Co.(closest dollar amount wins).
5. Since I don't get many Trick-or-Treaters, what will I be doing with all the gross candy from Oriental Trading that I can't possibly eat? Be specific.

For Hauntedwoods and Kadavar

1. Who is CheesePuff?
2. What is the name of the pinball machine in my basement that CheesePuff is playing in one blog photo?
3. Which Brainnn Candy contestant is my mother?
4. Which other Brainnn Candy contestant is a blood relation to me?
5. There are two other Brainnn Candy Contestants that I have met in person. Name one of them.

Good Luck one more time!

Alien Drool Sour Liquid Candy

2006-09-30T07:21:00.000-04:00

Sour liquid candy with an eye-dropper style dispenser. Varieties available are Red or Green with no mention on the label what flavors these colors might offer. We tried Red which had a scent I would describe as cherry-ish. The flavor was sort of a cherry or strawberry.

The label warns
DRIP ONLY in your mouth, or back in alien's nose..
Not the best design for sharing, it could be messy with kids.

This candy was not as haltingly sour as Skitz-O-Frantic. Both are made by Generation Foods. Generation Foods' website is interesting only in that it shows more of their candies available. There are no games or downloads.
Our Bunny readers might find this interesting.

Some Brainnn Candy Contest winners may find this in their prize pack.

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+gross candy+food

Brainnn Candy Contest -- Round 3 aka Final Round

2006-09-24T10:42:00.000-04:00

You kids are just too darn smart for your own good... Is this contest over yet...? Oh wait a minute! I think the last month has all been a dream and I'm waking up to find Bobby Ewing in the shower even though I thought he was dead... So the candy is mine all MINE ha ha! Erm, perhaps I haven't fully wakened from my dream after all.

The Answers From Round 2

1. Just as every Elvis fan longs to visit Graceland, SPAM fans worldwide now have their own pilgrimage to make. Name the place to visit the 16,500 square-foot Spam Museum (whew! That’s a lotta Spam). (1 point)
Answer: Austin, Minnesota (on Spam Boulevard!)

2. Barrett Hansen has spent the last 30 years introducing us to songs like, “Dead Puppies”, “Shaving Cream” and “Fish Heads”. By what moniker do we typically know Barrett? (1 point)
Answer: Dr. Demento

3. Dear old Dad. His wife was hacked to death in one film, and drugged and abducted in another. One daughter was one of the few not hacked to death in one classic film, and screamed her way through several other slasher flicks. Another daughter began as a model in Kotex ads. His photo was used on the cover of the Beatles Sgt Pepper album. In an early featured role he uttered the memorable line “Yonda lies da palace of my fadda da Caliph”. He is also quoted as saying, “The secret to a long and happy life? Young women’s saliva!” In keeping with the food theme, he is referred to by a would-be male lover as a snail (edible) in a classic movie. Who is this gift to food and horror movies? (2 points)
Answer: Tony Curtis

4. Jack The Ripper has appeared in a number of films, but only one rated 4-star. Name this silent-film classic. (2 points)
Answer: Pandora's Box
Some of you guessed Hitchcock's The Lodger. The Lodger featured a character referred to by some critics as a Jack The Ripper-type but the character in Pandora's Box is named Jack The Ripper. In The Lodger the killer's name is Jonathan Drew and he is also referred to in the film as The Avenger.

5. Speaking of Jack the Ripper, one of the worst rock singers of all time put out an album called “Hands of Jack The Ripper”. He was so bad that appearances by musicians, Ritchie Blackmore, Keith Moon and Noel Redding couldn’t salvage even mediocrity for this deadly album. Who is this artist? (1 point)
Answer: David Edward "Screaming Lord" Sutch (no relation to Screaming Jay Hawkins)

6. This fruit is distinctive for its large size, unique odor, and its formidable thorn-covered husk. Its flavor could be described as a rich custard highly flavored with almonds, but there are occasional wafts of flavor that call to mind cream-cheese, onion-sauce, sherry-wine, and other incongruous dishes. And its odor best described as pig-shit, turpentine and onions, garnished with a gym sock. It can be smelled from yards away. Despite its great local popularity, the raw fruit is forbidden from some establishments such as hotels, subways and airports, including public transportation in Southeast Asia. (1 point)
Answer: Durian (nobody was fooled here and I didn't expect anyone to be, I just love the descriptions)

7. One of the scariest movies of all time spawned one of the worst sequals of all time. In it, Richard Burton belches out the oh-so meaningful line, “Kokumu, help me find Pazuzu.” (This film is just one of many to contribute to Burton’s receipt of a Golden Turkey Award for Lifetime Acheivement of Bad Acting.) That’s not descriptive enough? Okay, check out this [edited] description I found on IMDb: Please tell me that I didn't see James Earl Jones in a big locust suit. Why is Africa made of fiber-glass? Why is Richard Burton made of stone? Oh, God. They couldn't have made this worse if they had scripted it so. Oh, wait...they did. Well, for all its faults at least it's not a desperate attempt by a major studio to milk whatever money they can out of a pre-existing hit by combining a-list actors, and a controversial visualist director, with a hastily prepared screenplay that shares little of the spirit and intelligence of its predecessor, producing a boring, although often laughably pious bastardization of something far, far greater. Oh wait....it is. If you're a fan of bad movies, you have reached Zen here. If you're a fan of the original, run, just run and don't look back. Run with your arms flailing into the night as the preview audiences surely did in 1977. (1 point)
Answer: Exorcist II, The Heretic

Round 2 had a total possible score of 9 Points. Here are the scores so far:

JadeMage -- 20 points
mbabes -- 16 points
miss lapin -- 17 points
Taulah Bankhead -- 13 points
Coof -- 14 points
Food B*tch -- 20 points
Kadavar -- 17 points
Hauntedwoods/Adam -- 17 points
Rabbitch -- 18 points
AJTossie -- 1 point (and yes, you ARE still eligible for a prize so keep those answers coming!)

Get ready for Round 3

1. Name the cracker company who for years had a recipe for Mock Apple Pie on the box back. (1 point)

2. Name the movie from 1966. Horrible acting and laughable special effects elevate this story of a family ensnared by a satanic cult a notch above your average bad horror film. Highlights include a Satan-like character who can’t stop laughing; the dreaded hounds of hell (or are those mangy dogs with big ears glued on?); and Torgo the monstrous henchman, who you know is evil because he has giant knee caps (a sure sign of the devil’s work). Yes, there’s even a catfight between gals in sheets! (2 points)

3. Fudgie the Whale is a versatile ice cream cake in the shape of a whale and was originally decorated as such, over the years the shape was adapted for holiday uses. The Easter Bunny could be depicted by using the whale's body as the face and the tail decorated to be his ears. Other characters, like leprechauns and Santa Claus were depicted in much the same way. Fudgie the Whale was often promoted around Father's Day, using the slogan, "For a whale of a dad." Name the ice cream company that developed Fudgie the Whale. (1 point)

4. The first of these was built in 1936, and was 13 feet long. It cost $5000 to build, and was made in Chicago. The most recently built one is 27 feet long and seats 6. Its V-8 engine is definitely needed to power this thing, and looks like it not only needs lots of gas but could give you lots of gas too! What unique yellow and orange item is this? (2 points)

5. This West Point attendee is considered to have popularized detective fiction as well as creating poems and stories of a more macabre nature. A rose and a glass of Cognac are left on his grave every year by a mysterious fan. (1 point)

6. Name the cool ghoul TV personality who performed autopsies on Jell-O. He also hosted a weekly horror movie show and recorded a song which cracked the US Top 10 chart in the 1950's. (1 point)

7. This Hollywood legend plays a doctor brought back from the dead, kept alive by drinking human blood. This may be the first film character to pet white furry animals as an indicator of insanity. The white stripe in the hair was also a clue. Who is this actor/actress? (2 points)

8. Name the cartoon from the 1970's that featured Dracula, a Witch, a Werewolf and a Mummy living together in a haunted hotel cracking jokes and singing songs to warp little impressionable minds like mine. (1 point)

Do Not Post Answers in the Comments Section -- You must email me your answers. Use an email address you already have for me or you may email brainnncandy@yahoo.com . Answers posted in the comments section will be disqualified.

Questions are numbered and your answer must also have the corresponding number. Simply number each answer as such: 1. Licorice Nibs, 2. The Crocodile Hunter, Steve Irwin, 3. The Tournament of Roses Parade, etc. You may change answers later if you wish. You may Google answers but as some contestants found out, some websites contain incorrect information, so be careful! Your last answer will be counted as final. You may email your answers until the following Sunday when the next round of questions will be posted as well as the answers from the previous round and the points tally. Each question will be followed by a point value for each correct answer. Each correct answer emailed to me will be awarded points and the person (living or dead) with the most points at the end of the contest will win the fabulous prizes described here.

Technorati tags candy+contest+horror+movies+food

Big Stuff Lip Pops

2006-09-20T06:14:00.000-04:00

Lollipops

Made by Flix Candy. The website says of Lip Pops, "After the candy is gone, the mouth remains as a toy"
No snickering from the adolescent boys!
Flix also makes Spooky Lip Pops with faces like a Werewolf, Alien or Monster. Many of the lip shapes are the same as the standard Lip Pops but some of the colors change to be more Monster-like.

Available in Wild Blue Raspberry and Watermelon Cooler. There are also lip-color choices of pink or red. We tried the Wild Blue Raspberry and the flavor was a decent blue raspberry; not too sour, not too sweet. The texture of the Lip Pops pop was not exactly like a Ring Pop, but similar. It was also about the same size as a Ring Pop but rounded rather than the jewel shape of Ring Pop.

This is what you'll look like when you eat a Lip Pop. Not a bad addition to that Gomer Pyle costume for Halloween.

I found tons of fun stuff on the Flix website and I hope to chance upon some projector pops. I bought my Lip Pops at my local Michael's Craft Store. They did not carry the Spooky Lip Pops or I would have brought them for show-and-tell.

Some Brainnn Candy Contest winners will receive Lip Pops.

Technorati tags candy+Halloween+horror+gross candy+food

Brainnn Candy Contest -- Round 2

2006-09-17T11:49:00.000-04:00

You have done well, Grasshopper.

Congratulations to all our players! I thought this was going to be a tough round and it was for some (we had two contestants drop out) but others are driven by the want for weird candy.

I apologize for not having any additional candy reviews this week to add to the prize packs but it's been the week from hell around here and I foresee next week will turn out much the same. It's Girl Scout Cookie time, you know!

The Questions and Answers from Round 1
1.Young Frankenstein travels to his grandfather’s castle and is greeted by Frau Blucher. Upon retiring for the night Frau Blucher asks if Dr. Frankenstein (that’s Frunkensteen!) would like a Brandy, warm milk or... this drink. (1 point)
Answer: Ovaltine

2.General Mills is cool because they make breakfast cereals featuring Count Chocula (a chocolatey Dracula), Frankenberry (a strawberry Frankenstein), and Boo Berry (a blueberry ghost). Name the cereal that General Mills once made that featured a Werewolf as the box icon. (1 point)
Answer: Fruit Brute

3.Mystery Science Theater 3000, a cult television comedy series featuring a man and his robot sidekicks who are trapped on a satellite in space and forced to watch particularly bad movies, especially (but not limited to) the science fiction genre. The gimmick of the show is that the man and his robots make a running commentary on the film, making fun of its flaws and wisecracking their way through the film. Name both of the men who hosted the show at different times during its 11-year series run. (2 points)
Answers: Joel Hodgson (played by Joel Robinson) and Mike Nelson (played by Michael J. Nelson)

4.In Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House, Cary Grants’ character is forced to stay at work all night in an attempt to write an advertising slogan for what food? (2 points)
Answer: Wham! Ham (If you ain't eatin' Wham!, you ain't eatin' ham!)

5.Which ice cream company’s website includes a page dedicated to ice cream flavors that were not popular sellers called, The Flavor Graveyard? (1 point)
Answer: Ben & Jerry's

6.This flowering plant smells of rotting flesh to attract flies which pollenate it. (1 point)
Answer: I was looking for voodoo lily(Amorphophallus bulbifer). Jademage clued me in that there were other flowers that smelled of rotting flesh as well (aren't we lucky to have such variety of carrion flowers???) but I will only accept flowers that smelled of dead things AND were pollenated by flies. Those are: Stinking Corpse Lily, Dragon Arum, Skunk Cabbage (MrG's favorite, btw), Dead Horse Arum and Putrid Flowers of the Indian Almond. I will not accept Corpse Flower (Amorphophallus Titanium, or Titan) because it is pollenated by carrion beetles and not flies (despite what some websites might suggest).

7.William Shatner stars as Marc, a soldier of pure heart who has just returned home injured from the war. He becomes the target of Kia, a beautiful female demon, who has become bored with taking the lives of corrupt men. Kia sets out to seduce Marc, but ends up falling in love, angering her sister demon and forcing her to summon the master demon to wreak revenge. Name this movie, the only film shot entirely in the artificial language of Esperanto. (This is a toughie, we'll award 3 points for this)
Answer: Incubus (hey, *I* thought it was tough but most everyone got this one)

Round 1 had a total possible score of 11 points. Here are the scores for this round, in no particular order:

JadeMage -- 11 points
mbabes -- 9 points
Miss Lapin -- 10 points
Taulah Bankhead -- 7 points
Coof -- 9 points
Food B*tch -- 11 points
Kadavar -- 10 points
Hauntedwoods/Adam -- 10 points
Rabbitch -- 11 points
AJTossie -- 0 points, but still in the running!

Get ready for Round 2

1. Just as every Elvis fan longs to visit Graceland, SPAM fans worldwide now have their own pilgrimage to make. Name the place to visit the 16,500 square-foot Spam Museum (whew! That’s a lotta Spam). (1 point)

2. Barrett Hansen has spent the last 30 years introducing us to songs like, “Dead Puppies”, “Shaving Cream” and “Fish Heads”. By what moniker do we typically know Barrett? (1 point)

3. Dear old Dad. His wife was hacked to death in one film, and drugged and abducted in another. One daughter was one of the few not hacked to death in one classic film, and screamed her way through several other slasher flicks. Another daughter began as a model in Kotex ads. His photo was used on the cover of the Beatles Sgt Pepper album. In an early featured role he uttered the memorable line “Yonda lies da palace of my fadda da Caliph”. He is also quoted as saying, “The secret to a long and happy life? Young women’s saliva!” In keeping with the food theme, he is referred to by a would-be male lover as a snail (edible) in a classic movie. Who is this gift to food and horror movies? (2 points)

4. Jack The Ripper has appeared in a number of films, but only one rated 4-star. Name this silent-film classic. (2 points)

5. Speaking of Jack the Ripper, one of the worst rock singers of all time put out an album called “Hands of Jack The Ripper”. He was so bad that appearances by musicians, Ritchie Blackmore, Keith Moon and Noel Redding couldn’t salvage even mediocrity for this deadly album. Who is this artist? (1 point)

6. This fruit is distinctive for its large size, unique odor, and its formidable thorn-covered husk. Its flavor could be described as a rich custard highly flavored with almonds, but there are occasional wafts of flavor that call to mind cream-cheese, onion-sauce, sherry-wine, and other incongruous dishes. And its odor best described as pig-shit, turpentine and onions, garnished with a gym sock. It can be smelled from yards away. Despite its great local popularity, the raw fruit is forbidden from some establishments such as hotels, subways and airports, including public transportation in Southeast Asia. (1 point)

7. One of the scariest movies of all time spawned one of the worst sequals of all time. In it, Richard Burton belches out the oh-so meaningful line, “Kokumu, help me find Pazuzu.” (This film is just one of many to contribute to Burton’s receipt of a Golden Turkey Award for Lifetime Acheivement of Bad Acting.) That’s not descriptive enough? Okay, check out this [edited] description I found on IMDb: Please tell me that I didn't see James Earl Jones in a big locust suit. Why is Africa made of fiber-glass? Why is Richard Burton made of stone? Oh, God. They couldn't have made this worse if they had scripted it so. Oh, wait...they did. Well, for all its faults at least it's not a desperate attempt by a major studio to milk whatever money they can out of a pre-existing hit by combining a-list actors, and a controversial visualist director, with a hastily prepared screenplay that shares little of the spirit and intelligence of its predecessor, producing a boring, although often laughably pious bastardization of something far, far greater. Oh wait....it is. If you're a fan of bad movies, you have reached Zen here. If you're a fan of the original, run, just run and don't look back. Run with your arms flailing into the night as the preview audiences surely did in 1977. (1 point)

Do Not Post Answers in the Comments Section -- You must email me your answers. Use an email address you already have for me or if you have not already registered, you may email brainnncandy@yahoo.com . Answers posted in the comments section will be disqualified.

Questions are numbered and your answer must also have the corresponding number. Simply number each answer as such: 1. Licorice Nibs, 2. The Crocodile Hunter, Steve Irwin, 3. The Tournament of Roses Parade, etc. You may change answers later if you wish. You may Google answers but as some contestants found out, some websites contain incorrect information, so be careful! Your last answer will be counted as final. You may email your answers until the following Sunday when the next round of questions will be posted as well as the answers from the previous round and the points tally. Each question will be followed by a point value for each correct answer. Each correct answer emailed to me will be awarded points and the person (living or dead) with the most points at the end of the contest will win the fabulous prizes described here.

You may now commence with the Googling.

Technorati tags candy+contest+horror+movies+food

Brainnn Candy Contest -- Round 1

2006-09-10T10:27:00.000-04:00

So, you think you're pretty smart eh, punk?

Before I begin the formalities, I'd like to say, "Thank you" to all the nice folks who signed up for this goofy ride. You make this the E-ticket of blogging. (*sniff* ahem!)

Now to the boring stuff you need to know...

In the interest of fairness and fun, I have decided to change the system for answering the questions (I just like to keep you guessing).
Do Not Post Answers in the Comments Section -- I know, I went through a lot of rigmarole trying to acquaint some of you with posting in comments, but I realized that it will be more fun to keep everyone guessing the answers until next week. This also gives those late-sleepers an equal chance at winning.
Instead, you must email me your answers. Use an email address you already have for me or if you have not already registered, you may email brainnncandy@yahoo.com . Answers posted in the comments section will be disqualified.

Questions will be numbered and your answer must also have the corresponding number. Simply number each answer as such: 1. Licorice Nibs, 2. The Crocodile Hunter, Steve Irwin, 3. The Tournament of Roses Parade, etc. You may change answers later if you wish. Your last answer will be counted as final. You may email your answers until the following Sunday when the next round of questions will be posted as well as the answers from the previous round and the points tally. Each question will be followed by a point value for each correct answer. Each correct answer emailed to me will be awarded points and the person (living or dead) with the most points at the end of the contest will win the fabulous prizes described here.

Now for some really non-boring stuff you'll want to know...

We had quite a few late entries. Enough that it pushed us past the requirement to include a Third Place Prize Pack! So, here are the prize packs you'll be playing for (this does not include any candy reviews I may do before the end of the contest which will likely be thrown in for good measure later).
In The First Prize Basket: Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters, a Bug Factor Lollipop, sour Ear Wax Candy, and an Alien Glow Pop plus a Harry Potter Chocolate Frog [comes with a Collectible Wizard Card], Lightning Pumpkins Gummie Candy, Captain Muddy's Bug Tube and Tweezers, Mentos Sours, Bug City Candy Tarts, Skitz'o'Frantic Candy (you know you want to see how sour it really is!), Gummy Fishies, and Smarties (because you can never be too smart).
The Second Prize Basket now contains: Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters, a Bug Factor Lollipop, an Alien Glow Pop, Captain Muddy's Bug Tube and Tweezers, Junk Mouth Candy Spray, and Alien Drool Candy.
Third Prize Basket holds: Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters, a Bug Factor Lollipop, Lightning Pumpkins, H&R Block Tax-ing Mints, and War Heads Sour Candies.
We will also have one very special prize. The requirements for winning this prize will be known only to MrG and me until the end of the contest and the prize itself (if won) will be revealed at the end of the contest as well. The requirements for winning this prize are such that, they will be emailed and time-stamped from me to MrG prior to the contest so that no foul play can be called later-on.

And Finally, The Questions For Round 1

1.Young Frankenstein travels to his grandfather’s castle and is greeted by Frau Blucher. Upon retiring for the night Frau Blucher asks if Dr. Frankenstein (that’s Frunkensteen!) would like a Brandy, warm milk or... this drink. (1 point)

2.General Mills is cool because they make breakfast cereals featuring Count Chocula (a chocolatey Dracula), Frankenberry (a strawberry Frankenstein), and Boo Berry (a blueberry ghost). Name the cereal that General Mills once made that featured a Werewolf as the box icon. (1 point)

3.Mystery Science Theater 3000, a cult television comedy series featuring a man and his robot sidekicks who are trapped on a satellite in space and forced to watch particularly bad movies, especially (but not limited to) the science fiction genre. The gimmick of the show is that the man and his robots make a running commentary on the film, making fun of its flaws and wisecracking their way through the film. Name both of the men who hosted the show at different times during its 11-year series run. (2 points)

4.In Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House, Cary Grants’ character is forced to stay at work all night in an attempt to write an advertising slogan for what food? (2 points)

5.Which ice cream company’s website includes a page dedicated to ice cream flavors that were not popular sellers called, The Flavor Graveyard? (1 point)

6.This flowering plant smells of rotting flesh to attract flies which pollenate it. (1 point)

7.William Shatner stars as Marc, a soldier of pure heart who has just returned home injured from the war. He becomes the target of Kia, a beautiful female demon, who has become bored with taking the lives of corrupt men. Kia sets out to seduce Marc, but ends up falling in love, angering her sister demon and forcing her to summon the master demon to wreak revenge. Name this movie, the only film shot entirely in the artificial language of Esperanto. (This is a toughie, we'll award 3 points for this)

Now, you know what to do, Dog... Bust a Move!
Email your answers anytime through next Sunday, 9/17 when answers will be revealed and points tallied.

Technorati tags candy+contest+horror+movies+food

Brainnn Candy Contest -- Last Chance For Sign-up

2006-09-09T08:20:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow begins the first round of trivia for the Brainnn Candy Contest so drag out those skull caps... er, thinking caps and get ready. Look for the first round of questions to show up around noon, eastern.

The zombie is taunting you with it. He knows you want the brainnns.

Junk Mouth Candy Spray

2006-09-07T04:54:00.000-04:00

Spray and Stay Tongue Stainer

Made by the same company as Skitz-o-Frantic. Available in Blue (Sour Cankerberry) and Green (Watermelon Wasteland). It had virtually no scent inside the bottle. We tried the Watermelon Wasteland and it was nearly the same flavor as Skitz-o-Frantic Apple, slightly sweeter (thank goodness!) and more liquid-y.

The more you spray, the more it stains the tongue but I wouldn't be particularly worried about staining with this. CheesePuff had 4 or 5 sprays (she didn't want any more after that) with almost no tongue staining. I had slightly more staining with 8-10 spays and the staining didn't remain more than a couple of minutes.

Like Skitz-o-Frantic, this is a good novelty candy and I would be more likely to buy Junk Mouth than Skitz-o-Frantic because I preferred the less-sour spray. Despite what the cartoon on the bottle shows, it left no bad breath.

Winners of the Brainnn Candy Contest might find Junk Mouth in their prize pack.

Sour Skitz-o-Frantic Candy

2006-09-04T16:50:00.000-04:00

Crazy Liquid Candy x2

Two separate but equally sour liquid candies in one tube. The one we tried was Green (Apple) and Blue (Tropical Punch). Red (Strawberry) is also available. The blue was only slightly less sour than the green but tasting the candy from the separate compartments is difficult.
CheesePuff's eyes watered when she tried this candy even though she was warned that it was sour.

This is a fun novelty candy but I wouldn't go out of my way to buy it just to enjoy as a candy treat.

Some Brainnn Candy Contest winners may find this in their prize pack.

Brainnn Candy Contest

2006-08-31T22:17:00.000-04:00

Help me break-in my new format by joining me and a few zombies as we host a Trivia Contest!

Beginning Sunday, Sept. 10, 2006 I'll be posting trivia questions about food, candy, horror, movies... (whatever I can come up with, really) to try and stump you (get it, zombie... stump...?) ahem, I'll do my best not to keep that up. You can answer the questions via comments and the first person to correctly answer each question will receive points (I haven't figured out all the details yet but I'll be as official and fair as possible). The person with the most points at the end of the contest will win an actual prize!

I will ask additional questions on Sunday, Sept. 17 and Sept. 24, 2006 and you may attempt to answer questions until the end of the contest on Saturday, Sept. 30, when winners will be announced and prizes will be awarded.

In order to receive your prize(s) you must register for the contest. Email me fabulous_cheesebabe[at]yahoo[dot]com with "Brainnn Candy Contest" as your subject line and let me know what name you will be playing (commenting) under. No need to give me all your snail-mail details now, I'll just need that if you win. You may register at any time before the end of the contest but, the more people who register early, the bigger and better the prizes get. So, if I only get 5 folks who register before the trivia begins, we'll have one First Prize winner. 10 folks who register before the trivia begins will ramp up to one First Prize and one Second Prize winner. 15 early registrations will result in one First Prize winner, one Second Prize Winner and one Third Prize winner. More early registrations means better prizes too, so tell your friends to register early. One registration per email address, okay? Let's not get greedy here... it's mostly about the fun.

Mr.G has agreed to be the impartial judge so if I screw up a question or there is some debate over validity, he'll give the final call. This contest will be open to everyone except Mr.G, who will probably help me select a few questions.

So what kind of prizes are you playing for? The First Prize Basket begins with Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters, a Bug Factor Lollipop, sour Ear Wax Candy, and an Alien Glow Pop (you see the Zombie at the top holding one). More to be (hopefully!) added soon but that's all up to you folks.

Once again, email me fabulous_cheesebabe[at]yahoo[dot]com with a subject line of Brainnn Candy Contest and don't forget the underscore (_) between fabulous and cheesebabe. Just include the ID you'll be using in the comments section so I can accurately award points as the trivving begins.

Update 9/3 - We now have enough registrants to allow First Prize and Second Prize! The First Prize Basket now holds:Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters, a Bug Factor Lollipop, sour Ear Wax Candy, and an Alien Glow Pop plus a Harry Potter Chocolate Frog [comes with a Collectible Wizard Card], Lightning Pumpkins Gummie Candy, and Captain Muddy's Bug Tube and Tweezers.
The Second Prize Basket now contains: :Harry Potter Cockroach Clusters, a Bug Factor Lollipop, and an Alien Glow Pop.

Welcome Back -- or, See How I'm Wrapping Up My Summer

2006-08-31T05:47:00.000-04:00

Dear people, I suppose you're tired by now of my excuses for not blogging often and telling of all my food adventures. The truth is, I've been hoarding my food adventures. Awful of me, I know. But I have begun to realize that my attention just can't be held by hundreds of photos of beautiful food creation processes. I want to see the mess, the slop and the yuck of food. (Don't worry, I won't be making any trips to chicken-processing plants!)

Other than food, one of my greatest pleasures is Halloween and I think I should try to incorporate my love of food and Halloween for more than one month of the year. That means many of my upcoming food tales will be about fun and yucky food or candy.

In the mean time, see why I've been so busy?

Our old house was insulated by injecting foam through holes drilled in the siding.

Then we got it painted (no, it's not finished yet). The neighbors HATE the new color. Luckily, they haven't turned into an angry mob about it yet. Maybe they're all still away on vacation. Don't mind all those weeds, it's been too hot to do anything about that.

Even CheesePuff is helping out.

Then there's this. Do you know what this is? This is my sad sad kitchen without a stove. Our old stove was struck by lightning and the new stove... well gee, um, SOMEbody (me) measured wrong and the new stove didn't fit. But the installers tried to make it fit and shattered the entire top. This all occurred during prime jamming time so no jam has been made. My freezer is full to the gills with fruit waiting to be made into jam. (Once the second new stove got here, the A/C broke so I didn't even dare try to test it out!)

Now that school is back on and the weather is beginning to cool off and the A/C is fixed... well, let's just say I have a long list of catch-ups. Blogging included.

Y'all come back now, 'hear?

Blogathon Begins

2006-07-29T09:49:00.000-04:00

Ha! Just seeing if you're paying attention with that last entry.

As of 9:00 this morning Blogathon has officially begun. I'll be watching my friends Bunni, who has horror movie trivia (and a prize you can win!.. I say 'you' because I haven't seen enough new horror movies to qualify for the prize) and Bakerina, who seems to be racing about New York in search of Internet access so she CAN blog... the poor dear. Perhaps Bakerina will entice interest in the Blogathon with her antics, only time will tell.

I hope that you will check them out while I am on my way to stuff my princess with ice creamy goodness at the grand re-opening of the local ice cream shop.

It

2006-07-29T09:40:00.000-04:00

2006-07-28T22:43:00.000-04:00

Time For Timer

What could be better than a public service announcement for cheese? Nothing I tell you!

There's Still Time - Blogathon 2006

2006-07-26T21:43:00.000-04:00

You still have time to get those pledges in for Blogathon 2006... occuring this weekend. I'll be checking out the early action of some of those crazy enough to blog for 24 hours straight, no guarantees about staying up for the late night action though I need to get enough rest so I can drink my face off in lovely Annapolis with a few folks from work. It should be a terrific time and if I'm lucid enough to take photos I'll bring in a few to share.

Watermelon!

2006-07-24T14:19:00.000-04:00

What could possibly be more refreshing than watermelon on a hot day? When it's hot outside and every woman is agonizing over how her thighs look in last year's shorts, it's sometimes tough to get people to buy cakes on impulse. I created this design with that in mind and people jump at this cake as soon as it goes in the case.
Evil plot to fatten America even further? No.
Clever marketing strategy? Absolutely!

Two cake layers are assembled with whatever filling seems refreshing that day. Then the cake is frozen for several hours, mostly because the temperature of the bakery is hovering in the high 90's. The cake is then iced with sweet buttercream (a mixture of super sweet shortening-based icing and vanilla buttercream) as opposed to our heavier, more butter-laden vanilla buttercream. The sweet buttercream is lighter in color than our Vanilla BC, easier to whip when the temps are high and doesn't turn to liquid butter at the mention of turning on the ovens.

The trick to this decorating technique is to have a steady hand and a little patience. The bands of color around the sides are applied heavily at first and then carefully shaved off while spinning the cake turntable continuously. The more gently the spatula is held against the side of the cake, the more fluid the resulting color blend. This does take some practice and this cake design is certainly not one I would try as my first attempt at the color blending technique. It will be somewhat forgiving in that you can always re-apply the bands of color and try again.

Happy Summering.

And finally, to the person from Iowa who found my blog by googling 'impossible to swallow 1 tsp. ground cinnammon'... that is just wrong Wrong WRONG!

Thank you and good night.

Blogathon 2006

2006-07-12T06:22:00.000-04:00

On July 29, hundreds of bloggers from around the world will put their endurance to the test for charity, blogging every 30 minutes for 24 hours straight. This is the Sixth Annual International Blogathon, an event that creates a worldwide community for a day, serves up fascinating content, and most importantly, raises tens of thousands of dollars for dozens of charities. Bloggers choose the charity and collect sponsorships. At the end of the event, those sponsors fulfill their pledges directly with the charity.

It's not too late to sign up if you'd like to blog! You can also help by sponsoring a blogger, just check out the List of Bloggers at the site. Stay up late, make a difference.

New Scope Flavors

2006-06-24T16:10:00.000-04:00

photos via drugstore.com

I know, Scope isn't food but I think you'll enjoy this story anyway.

MrG is a faithful Scope mouthwash user. He prefers the Original Mint flavor. He had recently purchased the Cinnamon Ice flavor for his daughter, age 14, at which point my 7-year-old became insanely jealous that he would buy something for her older sister and leave her out (if you know anything about kids, you understand how kids get jealous about the simplest gifts). So in an attempt to be fair (meaning, to placate) he bought for CheesePuff the other new flavor of Scope: Citrus Splash

In an unusual display of daring, MrG tried the Citrus Splash for himself, at which point there was violent coughing and sputtering. For 20 minutes. Accompanied by exclamations and facial expressions of distaste.

Then to me he says, "You need to try this!"

Thanks, Honey.

A Hofdingi of a Good Cheese

2006-06-03T18:18:00.000-04:00

I found this cheese at Whole Foods via one of the recommendation cards they occasionally put on cheeses to describe them so that cheese adventurers like myself will know what to expect when we nibble. The description of this one was something along the lines of, similar in texture and flavor to Camembert or Brie. That description was good enough for me.

This cheese was indeed smooth and mild and had a thin bit of rind similar to that of Brie. Though the outer surface of Brie and Hofdingi are perfectly edible, I prefer to remove the rind and have just the pure essence of cheese without the tangy, mouldy rind muddling things up.

Hofdingi comes from Iceland (any Nordic country reminds me of my homeland of Wisconsin, yah). It was delicious with slices of fresh baguette and a few olives and spicy marinated peppers from Whole Foods' olive bar.

Hay, Hay It's Donna Day#3: Cookie Challenge

2006-05-29T15:35:00.000-04:00

Elderberry-Lemon Cookie

Donna Hay Challenge #3

Brought to us by eatstuff, a challenge and contest to take a simple recipe and make it more difficult(?), at least that's how it always seems to work in my case.

First, the background.
So who is Donna Hay? She is a cookbook authoress who also has her own magazine. She is beloved because of her great sense of style and her easy to make recipes… her peanutbutter self frosting cupcakes spawned a recipe making chain reaction in the food blog scene last year, they were so popular they triggered Barbara to initiate the Hay Hay it’s Donna Day Food Event, where we take one Donna Hay Recipe and compete to see who’s version reigns supreme!

The Rules
Who can enter? ANYONE! Have a blog? Make the cookies!
Entries must be emailed by 1st June 2006
Cookies MUST HAVE ATLEAST 2 FLAVOURS
Cookies MUST HAVE ATLEAST 2 COLOURS
Winning Cookie will be chosen by a poll … which will either be by email or some polling system I make casey build….. he owes me……. But I will let you know the method at the round up.

Official RECIPE — ALL MEASUREMENTS ARE METRIC
Here is the official Donna Hay Conversion Chart
185 gms butter (6 1/2 ounces)
1 cup of caster (superfine) sugar
1 1/2 tsp vanilla extract2 1/2 cups plain flr (all purpose)
1 egg
1 egg yolk
3/4 cup cocoapowder
(eatstuff added cinnamon and Indonesian Chilli powder to hers, she says it was really good!)
1 tbsp milk
preheat oven to 180 C (355F).
Place the buter, sugar and vanilla ina food processor and process til smooth. Add the flour egg and egg yolk and continue til a smooth dough forms.
Remove half the dough and set aside. Add the cocoa and milk to the processor and process for 1-2 mins or until just combined. Remove the dough and roll betweern 2 sheets of bakingpaper until 5 mm or 1/4 inch thick. Repeat with plain vanilla dough. Use a square cookie cutter* to cut out squares arrange on baking sheet lined with baking paperto for cheqerboards. Repeat
Bake for 10 - 12 mins until crisp and golden. — You just lay the squares right next to each other they will stick together when they bake.
*Alt method 1) Use a ruler and a knife and cut small squares, can be fun and fiddly, esp if you want to make small squares*Alt method 2) Divide the 2 doughs and make long thin logs, join the together and then cut 1 cm thick slices. You will need a sharp knife.
Most Important thing to remember HAVE FUN!!!

And have fun I did!
Here's how my recipe varied from the original: I wasn't sure if the butter called for here was salted or unsalted so I used 1/2 cup unsalted and 5 Tablespoons salted. Upon tasting the dough before adding flavorings it was clear the butter should have been salted. I added a pinch of salt and divided the dough into two portions. To one half of the dough I added 3 Tablespoons of Elderberry Jam that I bought at the local Farmer's Market. To the other half, I added 2 Tablespoons Lemon Juice and Zest (I have been in the habit of keeping a few cups on hand at all times. I buy lemons on sale then zest and juice them all and freeze the entire works until I need it for a recipe.) Both doughs received a small amount of food coloring just to brighten the colors a bit. The additions of jam and juice made the dough extremely sticky. I rolled each dough into a log using waxed paper and let it refrigerate overnight. By the recipe, I thought this might make the dough too cold and tough to handle but in the morning it was still quite soft. I molded the two halves of dough together carefully and found that freezing it for a couple of minutes was my best bet for getting the cookies cut and into the oven without becoming a gooey mess.

After baking and cooling these cookies are still quite soft which is fine with me as I occasionally like a softer cookie. The flavors are a fantastic match.

Time To Get Back In The Swing With USNA Cake Pictures

2006-05-27T18:40:00.000-04:00

My blog posts are seriously lacking these days, I know. I have potential entries stacked up like cord wood and it's getting on my nerves. So let's start with picture time.

The workload at the bakery has been ridiculous. I don't think we've had a single weekend that wasn't busy since maybe the second week of January. This month, for example we've had large parties for the Kentucky Derby, then was Mother's Day, then Preakness. This past week we had a Navy picnic which required a 4,000 cookie order and then Naval Academy graduations. As a side note may I just say to everyone who traveled to Annapolis for USNA graduations, we're glad to have you but please DO NOT stop on the route 50 bridge to look at the Blue Angels as they fly over. Our traffic congestion is bad enough without you stopping in the middle of the highway to gape at the airplanes. Please have courtesy enough to pull part-way onto the shoulder of the road like the police do. That way, only one lane of traffic has to slow to a crawl. Thank you for your consideration.

I recall last years' attempt at recreating the Naval Academy seal cost me 3 hours of worktime for one cake. This year my USNA cake took 25 minutes from start to finish. That's some improvement! I think the result of this years' decoration is just as good as last year, if not better. Judge for yourself.
2006
2005

Ready For A Good Long Nap

2006-05-12T18:33:00.000-04:00

Flower Pot Detail
Originally uploaded by Grommie CheeseBabe.

You wanted to know what's been keeping me away from my dear Bloggity? These little darlings. I'm decorating Flower Pot Cakes in my sleep these days. What little sleep there is. Once Mother's Day decorating is over, I'll be glad to not see another Flower Pot Cake for a whole year!

You can check out more cakes via Flickr.

Candy To Make You Lose Your Lunch -- Ear Wax, Toilet Bowl

2006-04-22T16:25:00.000-04:00

Ear Wax Candy

Yes, it's a plastic ear filled with candy ear wax. Though it looks like the real thing, it's actually fruit-flavored gel. Attached to the package is an edible "Q-Tip". You eat the candy by dipping the swab into the ear and scooping out some ear wax.

Toilet Candy
Someone thought the world was their toilet bowl and to prove it, they made this little treat for the bravest of kiddies. Lick and then swirl the lollipop wand into the sour powder inside the toilet. There are apparently two lollipops for each toilet so I guess if you want, let your best friend share in your germy grossness.

More Ear Wax Candy
If one type of ear wax candy wasn't enough, I found another! This one has the option of a strawberry or green apple paste that is squeezed through ear holes of a plastic head. Those silly candy inventors.

I have never seen these in stores and have only found them in bulk packaging. Would you or anyone you know buy these candies? Would you try it if you won it in a contest? I'm extremely curious about these little gems and have to admit that I may be willing to buy them by the case if that's what it takes to give them a try. However, I certainly am not willing to eat an entire case of them. So tell me if you would eat this or know someone you'd love to give it to. If I get enough interest, I'll have a gross candy give-away contest.

Sweetie, Eat Your Quorn

2006-04-14T14:08:00.000-04:00

Quorn

Quorn was introduced to me by a co-worker some time ago. She told me that at a dinner party she fed her guests Quorn in place of chicken and no one was the wiser. I'm not easily fooled into enjoying meat substitutes so of course I was skeptical. Tofu has a tiny corner of my heart, true, but tofu is not meat. It doesn't look like meat and it doesn't taste exactly like meat even though it has a bit of meaty undertone. I have enjoyed a number of meat substitutes that were mainly TVP (textured vegetable protein) but sometimes they can have a grainy texture (no pun intended, though it is funny).

Quorn is extremely easy to cook. On a plate with a splash of water, covered with wax paper it takes 2 minutes to microwave from frozen. That's my kind of food! It's loaded with protein and has a small amount of fiber. I tried Quorn before I read anything about it. I think that may have been to my advantage. I have found that if I microwaved it slightly longer, say... 2 minutes 10 seconds it had a firmer, more chicken-like texture and less of the tangy fermented-yeast flavor than when I microwaved it for only 1 minute 50 seconds. And that was the only drawback I saw.

So, you ask, why does it have a tangy fermented-yeast flavor at all? I'll give you one guess. Yep, Quorn is made (in their words) with mycoprotein, from the fungi family - and a relative of mushrooms, truffles, and morel, that offers a strong nutritional profile and an authentic meat-like texture. But that's not all. On Wikipedia, I found this history, During the 1950s, a shortage of protein-rich foods was predicted by the 1980s. In response to this, many research programmes were undertaken to utilise single-cell biomass as an animal feed. Contrary to the trend, Lord Rank instructed the Rank Hovis McDougall (RHM) Research Centre to investigate converting starch (the waste product of cereal manufacturing undertaken by RHM) into a protein-rich food for human consumption. As I said, I'm glad I tasted it before I knew any of this as it sounds a tiny bit like Soylent Green.

So, is it tasty enough to replace all of my chicken meals? Almost
Is it something I would feed to my family? I doubt they'd go for it but they are the pickiest.
Should you try it? Absolutely! It's excellent with BBQ sauce.

Update: For those who are sensitive, it does contain egg protein and wheat ingredients.

Ebay Gems -- Magic Meat, Last Supper Mints, Pancake Necklace

2006-04-08T18:56:00.000-04:00

Canned Meat Magic A recipe book for those days when all you have in the cupboard is Spam, Mother Hubbard.

Want your guests to feel really special at your next dinner party?

Last Supper Dinner Mints
I guess if they complain about only being served bread and wine you can always crucify them. Happy Easter, kiddies!

Pancake Necklace that smells like maple syrup for when you're looking to attract that special someone... someone who really loves pancakes.

Out Of Office Notice

2006-03-31T17:23:00.000-05:00

I had hoped to participate in the Something Out Of Nothing event hosted (one time only!) by Lindy at Toast. However, due to lingering illness (I'm quite sick and tired of being sick and tired, to be sure!) and caretaking of MrG and his newly operated-upon foot, well there just isn't time to complete a proper entry.

I will return. I hope that you'll come back to visit when I do.

Blog Party Breakfast Sushi with Asian Tidbits and Passionate Kisses Mimosa

2006-03-17T17:34:00.000-05:00

I love brunch. Brunch for me has always been about the buffet: pancakes, eggs, waffles, sausage, omelets, ham, turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy... the list of my brunch favorites is as long as your arm. So, when I read Happy Sorceress suggestion that our Blog Party submission should be acceptable for a cocktail party, well, I had to struggle to keep it small but still satisfying.

Cocktail parties I've been to (don't say you've never been to a cocktail party, Grommie, they'll think you're a dork) have been few but I know that people want to sip drinks, mingle, talk, and nibble snacks. (Right? That's what a cocktail party is, right? Of course it's not a beer bash, it's sophisticated people getting to know each other over drinks.)

Sushi is very popular and while I don't think raw fish is what people want early in the day, it definitely fills the sophistication quota. I decided a fruit sushi is acceptable for brunch.

This Fruit Sushi is made with Lavash flat bread or crepes, a layer of blackberry mango jam, topped with a sushi rice and quinoa mixture, then papaya, kiwi and strawberry. Rolled up with a sushi roller, it was messy to prepare but turned out really beautiful. I think if I'd had more experience with regular sushi rice this dish would have been really simple.

This was also my first experience cooking quinoa (pronounced keen-wha). It's a grain that's high in protein and the protein is the reason I added it to this dish. There were just so many carbs going on that I felt I needed more of a protein balance.

I also thought, along with a main appetizer there could be a few small munchies. Everyone loves munchies.

Asian Tidbits
Wasabi peas turned out to be a nice addition of spice along with the fruity sushi. Continuing clockwise, cinnamon almonds, teriyaki crackers and rice crackers. All very fun to nibble while talking and drink sipping.

And the drink:
Passionate Kisses Mimosa is made with passionfruit juice, blood orange juice (that's lipstick for the kisses) and champagne or sparkling wine.

Quinoa's survival through the millennia may be attributed to the resinous, bitter coating that protects its seeds from birds and insects--and also shields them from the intense high-altitude sunlight. This coating, called saponin, is soapy and must be removed in a strong alkaline solution to make the grain palatable. Most quinoa sold in this country has already been cleansed of its saponin. But quinoa should be rinsed thoroughly before cooking to remove any powdery residue of saponin. Place the grain in a fine strainer and hold it under cold running water until the water runs clear; drain well.
Toast the grain in a dry skillet for five minutes before cooking to give it a delicious roasted flavor. To cook, use two parts liquid to one part quinoa. Combine the liquid and toasted quinoa in a medium saucepan, bring to a boil, reduce to a simmer, cover, and cook until the grains are translucent and the germ has spiraled out from each grain, about 15 minutes.

3 cups Japanese-style rice
3 1/4 cups water
1/3 cup rice wine vinegar
2 tbsp sugar
1 tsp salt
PREPARATION:

After washing the rice well, cook it by pan or rice cooker. Prepare sushi vinegar (sushi-zu) by mixing rice vinegar, sugar and salt in a small pan. Put the pan on low heat and cook until the sugar dissolves. Cool the vinegar mixture. Spread the cooked hot rice into a large plate (if you have it, use a wooden bowl called sushi-oke) by spatula. Sprinkle the vinegar mixture over the rice and fold the rice by shamoji very quickly. Be careful not to smash the rice. To cool and remove the moisture of the rice well, use a fan as you mix sushi rice. This will give sushi rice a shiny look. It's best to use it right away.
Makes 6 cups of sushi rice.

Ebay -- Croquette Babies and Velveeta Keeper. PLUS The Gallery of Regrettable Food

2006-03-07T06:06:00.000-05:00

The Japanese version of Mr Potato Head??

I found this on Ebay and realized that some people have probably never seen one of these or would even know what it's used for.

This is a Velveeta Block Keeper. In some areas of the country, Velveeta brand American cheese still comes in a large block to fit inside this case (some of you may remember these from the days before Velveeta Singles were available). The dimensions are not listed on the auction but a Velveeta block measures approximately 3x3x10 inches.

Someone PLEASE buy me this book.

A little snippet for your enjoyment:

Good Lord, good Lord. This looks like . . . like Orson Welles' liver. Like a shaved Horta. Like a cinnamon roll made entirely out of horse fat and brown sugar. Like Jabba the Hutt's prostate. I don't know what the hell this is. Maybe a roast of some sort. If so, it's a good Depression-era diet aid: this is what you would eat if you had more money, so be glad you don't.
How could you not fall in love with a book that has this description for starters?

Blog Party 8: Brunch: Worth Getting Up Late For

2006-03-06T16:44:00.000-05:00

Blog Party is a virtual cocktail party for food bloggers. It's a chance to make those little bites and fantastic drinks we all love, but never make. Blog Party is about taking time for us: setting aside some time to cook (which, clearly, we all love), to prepare appetizers we want to eat but never get around to. And best of all, it's about getting together, albeit via the Web, with like-minded friends.

Hosted by The Happy Sorceress

I think this could be a lot of fun.

Date for the Blogparty: Saturday March 18.
See you there. Bring a friend and a dish to pass.

Vibrant Veggies

2006-02-26T11:00:00.000-05:00

I'm trying to find the ambition to clear space to grow a garden. Maybe these will help.

Carrot Kaleidoscope

Cucumber Lemon

Sweet Pepper Chocolate Belle Hybrid

Eggplant Crescent Moon Hybrid

I would also like to grow one of these, but I may lack the technology.

Square watermelon

Now tell me, would this or would it not be the perfect thing for me and my Halloween obsession?

Can't Get Enough Weird Food on Ebay

2006-02-21T18:12:00.000-05:00

Virgin Mary on a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup

Okay, this is no Jesus Pancake but I think it's a weird food.

Mango Macadamia Pancake and Waffle Mix

Margarita Popsicle Set
AWESOME!

Everyone knows beans are musical. You thought only Jack had those that are magical. Think again.

Magic Beans

President's Day Cupcakes

2006-02-20T06:53:00.000-05:00

Almond cake with surprise cherry center.

Cupcakes with surprise centers have been around since Hostess introduced us to the Twinkie in 1930 and are becoming more popular than ever with home bakers. That may be thanks in part to Marcianne Miller's book, The Artful Cupcake which demonstrates cupcakes with flavors baked in as well as some whose tops are lopped off then filled. Then the tops are carefully replaced before being iced. Personally, I think there is an easier way center-fill a baked cupcake, but I'll talk about that another time, perhaps.

In honor of President's Day, I thought ol' George would appreciate a cupcake with a cherry center. Since I didn't find a recipe I really liked the look of and since I'm prone to stick with recipes that I already know will work, even when you fiddle with them a little, I went back to one of my favorites, Colette Peters' white cake. I also really like the base flavor and texture of this cake. The recipe describes the cake as having a flavor similar to angel food cake. The texture is firmer than angel food but still very tender and moist. This is also a cake I've used for sculpting and it holds together really well.

Before the cake, I had to figure out the filling.

I knew I wanted to bake the filling into the cupcake and since I was experimenting, it didn't much matter to me whether or not the filling turned the cake pink.

Along with Grommie-proof recipes, I'm a big proponent of using what I already have on hand. Over the summer I preserved a few jars of Bing cherries (just place cherry halves in half pint jars and fill jars to the top with Kirsch and hide them in the back of the fridge) and I keep boxes of Danish Junket pie filling on hand for making cake fillings.

I find this at the local Amish Market.

Prepare the Junket by mixing the 4 3/4 oz. packet with 2 cups water and boil for 1 minute. Let cool slightly.

In another pan, place the contents of one half pint jar of preserved cherries and about 1 cup of prepared Junket and reduce the mixture by half. Allow to cool while preparing the cake batter.

Measure your ingredients according to the recipe...
8 ounces each all-purpose flour and cake flour
2 tsp. baking powder
2 sticks (8 ounces) unsalted butter, at room temp.
21 ounces sugar
3/4 tsp. salt
1 tsp. almond extract
1 cup egg whites, at room temp.
1 1/2 cups milk, at room temp.

Egg whites? Nope, don't have those but I have Egg Beaters. Close enough.

Milk.

Geez, who drank all the milk?!?

Enter the hero.
I didn't bother with adding water, I just used the whole can.

Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Line cupcake pans with papers. Sift together flours and baking powder. Cream the butter and sugar until fluffy.

This is not fluffy.

My kitchen was a little on the cool side today, so it took longer than usual to get to the fluffy stage.

I got it eventually.

Add salt and almond extract and mix well. Add the flour mixture in 3 batches, alternating with the milk, mixing after each addition and ending with the milk. Mix just until combined. Do not overmix.

Fill cupcake pans 1/3 full of cake batter.
Fill a disposable pastry bag with cherry filling and snip off enough to allow cherry halves to pass through.
Place about one tablespoon of cherry filling in the center of each batter.
Cover each filling with batter.

Luckily for me, this batter is not a high riser or my cupcakes would have been huge. Just be sure not to fill papers completely full or you'll have frisbees on top of your cupcakes.

Wait patiently next to Jar Jar Binks for the cupcakes to bake (20 - 25 minutes or until a skewer comes out with moist crumbs. Allow to cool in pans 5 minutes.).

Some variations -- regular filled, filled and topped with chopped almonds (this wasn't that great), cherry filling blended (CheesePuff liked these mostly because they were pink), mini blended with cherry jewels on top (these would be cute with a finger dessert assortment).

Allow to cool completely then top with powdered sugar or Marshmallow Icing.

I used Bing cherries because that's what I had on hand. Preserved sour cherries would have been a nice contrast to the sweetness of the cake and icing (and probably more historically correct for the story of Mr. Washington's tree fiasco).

Ebay Jesus Pancake

2006-02-18T09:27:00.000-05:00

Have you heard about the Jesus Pancake for sale on Ebay? Apparently someone cooked up a flapjack touched by the hand of God. Then someone else's pancake was touched by the hand of God, then another and another!

Starting Bid = $100.00

Blueberry Starting Bid = $9.99 ($10 shipping)

Jesus on one side, Mary on reverse.
Buy It Now Price = $10,000

Or just buy the mix. The seller says it's been blessed by Saint Jemima.
Starting Bid = $0.99

My personal favorite making a come-back on Ebay

Spooky Toast Images

Our Lady of Guadalupe

Australian Jesus Toast

Most Convincing

Brrrr

2006-02-13T06:41:00.000-05:00

This little baby was my saving grace yesterday.

We were one of the thousands without power when this storm hit. We live in an older neighborhood and while the gigantic oak and holly trees are beautiful, they are not used to holding heavy snow and I'm pretty sure they try to head directly for the power lines when they fall. Fortunately we were able to sleep through part of the outage. Unfortunately it was the warm part. Our home is not well insulated and by the time the power was restored 13 hours later, it was quite chilly inside the house.

I am thankful we have a gas stove that only requires a beginning light when power is out and even more thankful for a gas water heater.

I am also thankful that the large tree branches that fell around our home didn't fall directly onto it. Our house needs a bit of fixing but I don't wish to have any ready-made sky lights.

This belongs up there.

Hong Kong has Disney biscuits? I want that!

Blogger Stinks

2006-02-04T20:04:00.000-05:00

After spending a large portion of the morning on a post, blogger has eaten it.

As soon as my fury subsides I'll begin again and perhaps by the end of the day Monday, I'll have fresh material.

Won't Mother Be Proud?

2006-01-30T20:10:00.000-05:00

You Are Lemon Meringue Pie

You're the perfect combo of sassy and sweet
Those who like you have well refined tastes

What Kind of Pie Are You?

Good... but I actually prefer this one.

You Are a Fruitcake!

You taste like nothing else in this world.
And get ready, you're about to get tossed!

What Crappy Christmas Gift Are You?

Brought to you by my own variety of dementia.

IMBB 22 : I Used My Noodle and Made Chicken Sate with Linguine

2006-01-28T18:25:00.000-05:00

My current reduction in the frequency of blog entries is getting on my own nerves. Since Thanksgiving, I've posted once a week at most. Around the holidays it was due to lack of time but that is no longer the case.

Is it writer's block? No... in fact, I've begun a number of posts that are waiting in the wings to be completed.

Is it a lack of interest in food? Not really. I'm trying lots of new foods with my New Year's resolution to get healthier (let's not call it a diet, the word scares me) and while not all of the foods I've tried have been anything to write about, some are noteworthy and I intend to talk about them soon.

I believe my trouble is cabin fever. Years in Wisconsin taught me that winter was to be enjoyed among the snowbanks and while I was never much of a snow-bunny myself, I couldn't help but go out in it and sometimes it was even fun. In Wisconsin, cabin fever typically sets in when it's nearing spring and things are beginning to warm up and I'd get the itch to plan a garden (or more likely window boxes) and with a clean white slate to dream on, late winter held the perfect opportunity. Now that I'm in Maryland and we don't get 15 feet of snow, I haven't had the opportunity to be outside for any length of time, even for snow shovelling. The garden is calling to me but even though temperatures are in the lovely 50's (perfect for garden clean-up!) it's still too early to poke around too much since plants need the leaf mulch to protect them from still-present biting night winds.

Thankfully, I have IMBB to help get me rolling back into blogdom. Cooking With Amy set me on a course to talk about how I like my pasta and while, in this dish the pasta is simply a vehicle for the wonderful sauce, the type of pasta, Linguine, is the perfect shape to carry all of the wonderful sauce to my eager palate.

Sate' (pronounced sah-TAY) is a spicy sauce typically made with peanut butter. It's easy to find chicken sate' in the frozen foods section of the grocery but making it yourself is so easy (the most difficult thing about it is cooking the pasta) and infinitely more tasty than those packaged foods.

My favorite version of this sauce has lots of garlic and a little kick from red pepper sauce. Some recipes call for other ingredients like fresh ginger or a citrus juice of one variety or another so this time around I marinated my chicken in a mojito sauce that contained mango, lime and orange flavors just to see how I liked it. The flavors married well but if it's simplicity you're after, then just skip it! When I'm in a really lazy mood I skip the chicken entirely.

Peanut Sate' Sauce
6 cloves garlic, chopped
1/4 cup creamy peanut butter
1/4 cup hot water
3 tablespoons soy sauce
1 tablespoon sesame oil
2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
1 teaspoon red pepper sauce (like Tabasco)
1 teaspoon honey

Place the garlic and peanut butter in a small bowl. Pour the hot water over both and whisk gently until peanut butter is very smooth. Add remaining ingredients and let stand while the pasta cooks.

Linguine is the perfect shape pasta to showcase this beautiful sauce. After cooking, drain the linguine well but do not rinse so that the residual starch helps hold the sauce.

My recipe calls for 1/2 pound of linguine but I find a little of the sauce goes quite a long way and could easily dress 1 1/2 pounds of cooked lingiune. The sauce keeps well for a few days in the fridge so make the full recipe and have it available for the next sate' craving you're bound to have. Just be sure to stir the sauce well before adding to the next delicious bowl of linguine.

Recalling the frozen selections of Chicken Sate': they often contain a few vegetables which you could also add if you were in the mood. Fresh peas, peapods, bamboo shoots, water chestnuts or carrots are good choices.

I chose a green salad with Asiago cheese, toasted pine nuts, balsamic green beans and a splash of Goddess dressing as a go-with.

IMBB # 22 + Noodle

Movie and Wine Tasting -- Alamos Malbec with Topkapi

2006-01-17T18:34:00.000-05:00

The kiddies are tucked safely into their beds the younger on her face with her arm wrapped around a stuffed horse her same size and the older under a mountain of blankets with just her nose peeking out. Mr.G and I finally have time to watch a movie and enjoy each other's company.

Saturday was the end of one heck of a week for both of us and we decided we needed some down-time together. The perfect opportunity for a bottle of wine and a good old movie.

I asked the guy at the wine store for a wine to "just drink with a movie and possibly some cheese and crackers".

Alamos Malbec was his suggestion. I'm usually pretty leery of wine costing less than $25 and my skeptisism must have shown on my face because he assured me that the wine was better than the $10 price indicated.

The wine guy described it as: full fruit beginning, a rich body and nice oaky finish. Wine Advocate describes it as aromatically displaying lively red as well as black fruits, the medium-bodied 2004 Malbec exhibits lovely breadth in its cherry-packed personality. Expressive, fresh and satin-textured, it reveals a structured tannin-filled finish. This excellent value should be drunk over the next 2 - 3 years. Score: 87. (87 out of 100) I'm not fluent in wine taster-ese but this was a pretty good wine in my opinion.

The movie this time around was Topkapi from 1964. Mr.G enjoys introducing me to lots of classic movies and movies he feels are important to have seen at least once. Amazon describes: A small-time con-man with passport problems gets mixed up with a gang of world-class jewelry thieves plotting to rob the Topkapi museum in Istanbul. Turkish intelligence, suspecting arms smuggling, gets involved, and under pressure the con-man rises to heights he'd never dreamed of. The con-man is played by Peter Ustinov and the role won him an Academy Award.

This was quite a fun movie despite Elizabeth Lipp giving me the creeps from her first moment on screen.

Candy Candy Candy

2006-01-13T18:50:00.000-05:00

With the holidays over, it's time for me to start eating healthier. I prefer to avoid the term dieting since dieting makes me think of starving models. I'd rather make small changes like eating fewer sweets. If you're like me and you'd like to start with a small change, maybe a stroll through another country's candy aisle will give us encouragment on our journey.

From Germany

Katjes Salty Licorice Herring

Chocolate cat tongues

Sour Gummi French Fries

Hot & Spicy Gummi Taco

From Mexico

Hot and salted tamarind pulp bars

Gummi bears coated with chili powder

If these don't steer me to the produce aisle, nothing will.

IMBB 22 : Use Your Noodle

2006-01-11T16:23:00.000-05:00

Brought to us by Amy of Cooking with Amy. She tells us, In addition to being defined as "ribbon-like pasta", noodle also means brain and to improvise. So go ahead, use your noodle, noodle around and then post about it. Come join in the second anniversary of the first online food blogging event, created by Albert of Il Forno, Is My Blog Burning, IMBB 22. This time around it's noodles, pure and simple. Or fancy and complicated. It's up to you. You can make them from scratch or use dried ones. Egg noodles, wheat free, gluten free, spinach noodles, you name it--it's all good. Just remember this is about noodles, not dumplings. You might have heard that Marco Polo introduced noodles to the Italians. While the accuracy of that story is up for debate, late last year some 4,000 year old noodles were discovered in China. And in Italy, while the actual noodles weren't found, decorations in an Etruscan tomb show what appears to be pasta being made. Meanwhile 10th century Arab cookbooks mention noodles and some speculate that it was the Arabs that brought pasta to Italy in the 9th century. We may never know where they originated, let alone when. What we do know is that noodles are popular all over the world for good reason--they're delicious! If you plan on participating, post to your blog on January 28th or 29th.

Check out Amy's blog for complete details.

Ask A Pastry Chef: How to Clean that Strainer

2006-01-09T15:07:00.000-05:00

An interesting question from Randi:
How do you clean a finemesh strainer? I have an OXO one and when I strain custards or soups, they get so gross!!

continue reading at Ask A Pastry Chef

Flavored Lip Balm

2006-01-02T07:15:00.000-05:00

Remember Bonne Bell lip balms? All your favorite flavors could be held in a little tube and you could have a taste without actually getting Mom's evil stare for having candy or soda.

The idea has resurfaced in a big way. Made by Lotta Luv but don't expect to be able to order from the Lotta Luv website. The newest of these flavors can be purchased at various online shopping sites, eBay or eBay Canada in flavors like Cinnabon,Kellogg's Froot Loops Hostess Twinkies, Ho Hos and Ding Dongs. Slightly more frightening flavors like original Potato Chip, BBQ Potato Chip or Sour Cream & Onion Chip.

None of those can top

Cheetos lip balm scalped from Foodgoat
Is it neon orange like real Cheetos? Will it turn your lips that lovely shade? I'm a big fan of Cheetos snacks and I'm pretty sure that if I applied Cheetos flavored lip balm I would feel compelled to actually eat Cheetos. In light of my New Year's resolve to eat healthier perhaps I should skip this calorie-free taste sensation.

We Love To Hate -- Semi Homemade with Sandra Lee

2005-12-26T21:46:00.000-05:00

Ooh such a novel idea but what a bumble-head for a host! Though she attended University of Wisconsin, we Wisconsinites refuse to recognize her as one of ours.

I have seen her show a few times and am less impressed with each visit. She touts herself as a caterer and party planner. She is neither and never been. She has been a shill for QVC.

A recipe from her website:
Pink Linen Dusting Powder
10 Wonka™ red PixyStix® candy powder straws,Nestlé's®2 tbsp powdered sugar, C&H®
Prep time: 5 minutes
PREPARATION:Empty Pixy Stix® into a bowl.
Add powdered sugar and mix.
Using a fine mesh sieve, sift mixture into another bowl.
Repeat until mix is well combined and dusting powder is even in color.
Apply powder to yourself and the bed sheets with a new makeup brush or power puff. Enjoy!

I'll bet Sandra has ant infestations in her bedroom if she's dusting with PixyStix.

Now that it's holiday time, they have her looking especially sexed-up. Did you see the personalities get together for a holiday special? Bobby Flay actually rolled his eyes when he saw Sandra Lee walk in the room! He knows she has no talent, no skill in the kitchen. He couldn't even hide it for filming the show.

Wikipedia says, Critics are concerned with the abundance of alcohol used on the program. (In 2004, the show began including a regular segment titled "Sandra's Cocktail Time", and frequently showcases drinks with a high alcohol content.)

On eGullet
Soba: Sandra, fwiw, fills a niche: she fulfills the need for people to see how truly abysmal her brand of "cooking" is, so that when they experience the real thing, they'll flee for the hills and never ever look back.
lyz2814: -She decorated a store bought cake with canned frosting and CORN NUTS!

The tag line of her website says, Semi-homemade 70% premade, 30% fresh. Sandra is 100% grade-A ham.

It's The Holiday Season So Hoopdee Doo And Dickery Dock

2005-12-19T19:36:00.000-05:00

I got my Christmas shopping done... finally! So now I can get back to blogging.

First, I need the thank Templar of Food Ninja for the great BBM3 package.

I enjoyed this exchange so much I may be tempted to stick my toe in the Blog By Mail pool one more time.

Templar's package was thrilling, I must say. I felt a bit like Alice in Wonderland with all of the eat me, drink me instructions. The envelope on the outside of the shipping tube instructed me to open it first. In the envelope was a Canada Safeway grocery receipt (all veggies Templar... what gives?) with a note on the back telling me where to find my next clue which happened to be hidden in the archives of his blog.
Templar's instructions for opening the shipping tube:
1 Peel back the tape till you find the string with the black ends.
2 now sitting on the floor or in your favorite chair place the tube between your knees
3 grab the string closest to you left knee with your right hand
4 grab the string closest to right knee with your with your left hand
5 pull towards the middle..
I was really hoping line 6 was not something along the lines of kiss your @ss goodbye. And it wasn't!

Here is a list of all the great stuff in the tube sent by Templar:
Coffee Crisp candies (a bit similar to the texture of Kit Kat)
Homemade oatmeal cookies (these were nearly gone before I even tasted them. Delicious!)
Cheezies (super funky cheese aroma but they tasted really good)
Butter Rum Life Savers (I haven't had Life Savers in a very long time so this was a fabulous treat)
A snowman ornament for the Christmas tree (cute! I have been eyeing those too.)
Store fliers from Templar's area (I wish my groceries were that inexpensive!)
The shipping tube also had a couple of recipes written by Templar

Second, I need to thank Rachel via The Amateur Gourmet Secret Santa cookbook exchange for sending Alton.

Is Alton beginning to look like Elton?

Anyway... thank you, thank you to the generous Templar and Rachel.

...And don't forget to hang up your sock

Ask a Pastry Chef: Italian Pastry Lobster Tail

2005-12-12T13:53:00.000-05:00

A question from Ann:
I came across an Italian pastry whose name meant "lobster tail". It looked more like a clam shell with its grooves winding around and around from a apex, spreading outward. The texture was crisp, fried not baked. The filling was ricotta flavored with orangepeel and citron chunks. Slightly sweetened. Do you know anything about it?

continue reading at Ask A Pastry Chef

Parent Control

2005-12-08T06:17:00.000-05:00

You may have seen this emailed about. Thanks to Sharboobie for sending it to me.

Ebay in Time for Christmas

2005-12-04T00:29:00.000-05:00

I'll bet they're low carb.

Original Cricket Snax
In Salt n' Vinegar, Bacon & Cheddar Cheese, and Sour Cream & Onion flavores to satisfy your urge for crunch!
They are better for you than greasy crisps and they do taste far better anyway
Please specify prefered flavour when ordering.
chirp... chirp!
This product is safe for human consumption. Insects are farm raised under the strictest conditions

I want to see the cricket farm but I'll bring my ear plugs.

A turkey dinner for sale on Ebay?

NO! It's a jello mold. Just add evaporated milk to achieve an opaque look. *gack*

Jones Soda Holiday Pack

You can find the Jones Soda holiday pack at Ebay, but if you buy it from a store or directly from the Jones website, the proceeds go to St. Jude Children's Research Hospital.
Flavors in the national holiday pack are Brussels Sprout with Prosciutto, Cranberry Sauce, Turkey & Gravy, Wild Herb Stuffing, and Pumpkin Pie. If you're lucky enough to find a regional pack, you'll enjoy the flavors: Broccoli Casserole, Smoked Salmon Paté ,Turkey & Gravy, Corn on the Cob, and Pecan Pie. I might try these once, just for a thrill.
Oh, and holiday packs also come with Serving spoon, moistened towelette, and suggested wine list.

Remember a while back there were literally hundreds of freaky images for sale at Ebay created by masses of possessed toasters? Today, I couldn't find a single one. I guess the aliens must have loosened their grip on the toasters of world.

So there you go! Plenty of gift ideas for all the loved ones on your list.
Have a Holly Jolly Christmas!

Ask a Pastry Chef

2005-11-30T16:54:00.000-05:00

Like many bloggers, I have set up a system to track what draws new people to my site. Search engines and other blogs draw lots of unique visitors. Of course, many of you who visit regularly are quite unique, yourselves... you know who you are. Many people land at my site because they are searching for a particular recipe or list of ingredients without knowing the recipe name. Now, I'm not html savvy enough to figure out how to put up one of those searchable recipe databases that some bloggers have on their site. So I'll do the next best thing...

I'll just ask you.
Are you searching for a particular recipe? Or perhaps you want to know a technique like say, how to get the most volume from whipped cream.

Go ahead, ask me, I can take it.

I may not have the answer right at the tip of my tongue but I have many resources including other pastry chefs (those who actually went to culinary school) at my disposal to ask if the need arises.

I'll hook up one of those funky sidebar things so searchers can ask a question without having to do a lot of additional searching within the site. We'll see how creative I can get without much sweating and cursing.

P.S. IF I get a lot of rude or indescent emails, I'll have to send MrG on a road trip to find you and wash your mouth out with LifeBuoy.

We Love To Hate -- Rocco DiSpirito

2005-11-29T18:06:00.000-05:00

I used to like Rocco.
Cute and endearing on the surface. Recently, I caught an episode of The Restaurant2 (don't ask) and turned my opinion 180 degrees. In the episode I saw, he fired the head chef of his restaurant for (what sounded like) legitimate reasons... being a yes-man during meetings, then going back to the kitchen and continuing to run things the way he always had, which just happen to have resulted in success. Rocco called the chef's actions insubordination. The more I watched, the more it sounded more like a power play by Rocco.

After firing the head chef, Rocco volunteers to chef until they can hire a replacement. Rocco steps in, much to the dismay of the rest of the kitchen staff, makes a few meals, then sneaks up to make an appearance in the dining room. Busy looking cute and making new friends, Rocco forgets all about the poor chefs still in the kitchen, causing restaurant patrons to not only have to wait more than an hour to be served appetizers, but some are never served at all. Bad business, Rocco.

With the failure of the restaurant, Rocco is putting his name on lots of new stuff like wine clubs, items at QVC (yeah, Rocco is really using that FoodSaver, I'll bet), and of course tons of cookbooks. For only double the price, you can have Rocco write a personal message in your signed copy. For my $75, Rocco better give me more than a little ink.

You can read the transcripts of Rocco's radio appearances here. I'll summarize what you'll find there: lots of lame jokes by Rocco who is only interested in accessing your dollars. If you are a freshly implanted 20-year-old, Rocco might be willing to share his 5-minute flavor.

Original Recipe: Noodle Pie

2005-11-26T16:35:00.000-05:00

Is that a great name for a pie, or what?

And see how great it looks?

This pie uses left-over, cooked spaghetti noodles as a binder rather than utilizing a pastry shell. The custard that surrounds the noodles is eggy, creamy, and only slightly sweet so it makes a perfect breakfast if you, like me, need a bit of protein to get your morning started off right.

For dessert, this pie would be great topped with a rosette of chocolate ganache, a bit of cherry coulis, or just a few perfectly ripe strawberries.

The next time you're making spaghetti for dinner, reserve a little to put in this pie and your breakfast the next morning will be fantastic.

Noodle Pie
makes 8 to 10 servings
2 cups cooked spaghetti noodles
3 whole eggs
2 egg yolks
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/4 tsp. salt
1 tsp. Bourbon vanilla
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1/4 tsp. nutmeg
1 cup heavy cream
1 cup milk (or evaporated milk, or a combination)
[my basic custard pie recipe calls for 2 cups milk, but I found I liked it better with some cream]

Break spaghetti noodles into about one inch pieces and place in a 9-inch deep dish, glass pie pan.

In a bowl, gently stir together eggs, yolks, sugar and salt until sugar is dissolved. Do not whip as you don't want to incorporate air into the mix. Add vanilla and spices then stir in cream and milk. Pour the custard mixture over the noodles and gently nudge the noodles under the surface of the custard. If noodles are left sticking out of the custard they will become very chewy in the oven.
Bake at 325 degrees for 35-40 minutes. A knife inserted in the center should come out clean and edges should be puffed and light brown.
This pie is definitely better the next day so once it's cool, cover tightly with plastic wrap and refrigerate. In the morning, slice, pop it in the microwave, zap on medium for a minute and a half *and presto! A super quick breakfast for those hectic mornings.

After much Googling with no results that I would consider to be the same end product, I'm satisfied in believing I have invented this. Of course, if you know this pie by a different name, by all means let me know.
The closest cousin of this pie is the Noodle Kugel which typically contains cottage cheese. The Noodle Kugel was my inspiration for this dish.

I intend to try this pie with cheese ravioli instead of spaghetti, which would nudge it closer to that Noodle Kugel.

I hope you enjoy this recipe.
*of course, microwave wattages vary, so use your best judgement for your machine.

Over The Edge with Thanksgiving Photos

2005-11-23T16:54:00.000-05:00

Over the edge of the bed, that is. And back from feeling somewhat like a dead fish.

Tomorrow I'm giving thanks for my bed and for that dear young woman, Sara* who worked way more than she should have been expected to. When I left the second time, she had been at work for 24 hours straight. We were basically done at that point and only one wedding cake remained to be decorated. You'll be relieved to know she has the next 4 days off... quite uncommon for our industry but well deserved, I must say.

I know you're excited to see the photos, so let's get to it.

The turkeys lined up in the catering kitchen and ready to be seasoned before going in the ovens.
In the foreground are pumpkin muffins baked for a big day of salad sales in the cafe'. Rather than a roll or breadstick, we serve a pumpkin muffin with each meal salad. Pumpkin muffins are also popular as a side item with catered meals.

The Cakes.
Well, a few of them anyway. We had them stashed into every cranny we could find. Hope caterers found them too!
On a typical weekend day we have orders for ten to twenty decorated cakes and five frozen pies (chocolate mousse, key lime, etc.) or cheesecakes. For Thanksgiving we did... *drumroll*
90 decorated cakes
167 pies and cheesecakes

We had only a few dozen specialty breads, which I thought was odd. I didn't count the number of pumpkin muffins but it also was rather low for a big holiday, probably somewhere in the range of 20 dozen.

The hardworking bakery after a long night... not too filthy but don't ask me how that happened.
The clock on the wall says 5:00. That's a.m. Finished early. I think it was a miracle.

Besides sleep, what do I use to recover from a long night in the bakery?

tomato soup

grilled cheese sandwich

Sobe Energy drink

Allegra allergy meds.

And that's all I need.

Later tonight I'll be baking my own pumpkin pie and my own invention: noodle pie. I'll be posting photos and recipe soon.

*Names changed to protect the innocent and my hiney.

On The Edge

2005-11-22T17:51:00.000-05:00

I have slept 9 of the last 70 hours and I'm antsy. More antsy than my kid who has been bored and virtually alone for two days of the 5-day Thanksgiving week off from school.

My house is cleaned (as much as my house gets clean), my dishes are done... except the ones that are cooking on the stove as I type. Am I preparing for a Thanksgiving banquet? No. Am I famished after a long day in the bakery? No. I miss the kitchen.

It's a sickness, I know.

I miss the excitement of the chefs yelling caliente and racing past with full steamer pans on their way into the catering kitchen from the line. There is a certain something possessed by anyone who chooses to work in a kitchen. Something that makes each one of us love that push; the rush. Not a rush of adrenaline (although one of you might tell me that's part of it) but a rush of pushing the food out as quickly as it is made to the waiting hands of a customer and crossing fingers in hopes they are satisfied.

I miss seeing how my new boss deals so gracefully with the pressure of the bakery's busiest days of the year. A few people have asked me if Christmas party season isn't busier than Thanksgiving and it is, but the number of orders is spread out over a longer period of time so there isn't the same concentrated blast of pressure that we have this week.

I also feel a little guilty for not being able to help Sara* more. Not only to help her with the monstrous workload, but to divert the attention of the worst of the raving lunatics in the bakery from casting an evil eye and wicked hot breath in her direction.

I worked at 3 this morning (despite being delayed a full 40 minutes due to a traffic accident which caused me to find a new route to work). I plan to go back to bakeryland as soon as MrG comes home from work. I will be there all night but then I'll get my rest at some point tomorrow before baking my own pumpkin pie. And I will be happy and exhausted and satisfied at doing a fine load of baking.

Photos of the craziness to follow soon.

*Names changed to protect the innocent and my hiney.

The Holidays Are Coming! The Holidays Are Coming!

2005-11-19T16:24:00.000-05:00

You might think with the holidays approaching that I would attempt to remove as much stress from myself as possible. You would be foolish in thinking this. For many people this is the most stressful time of year. I personally am hoping to distribute my stress over several weeks rather than having one or two montrously stressful days that would undoubtedly transform me from mild-mannered pastry chef into mega-bitch on wheels.

It is my first Thanksgiving at my current place of employment and I'm told that Thanksgiving is the worst time of year for our bakery. So far this month we have lost two employees, lost one manager and gained a new one, and gained a cake decorator with no experience (and who is paralyzed by her fear of making an ugly cake). All of these things alone would make a typical day in the bakery into a nightmare.

Now compound these things into quintupled orders all due on one day.

I'm told that everyone who worked in the bakery (and most of the people who worked in the catering kitchen) last year worked 36 hours straight in order to fill all the orders on time.

Over the last two weeks my stress level has increased but I wouldn't say it has doubled quite yet.
Despite the increase in stress I have managed to agree to:
make 12 gingerbread houses for my daughter's Brownie troop to decorate at their next meeting.

I've taken a 150-piece pastry order.

I have yet to complete and mail my Blogging By Mail3 requirements which were due last weekend.

I also invited a friend to my home for Thanksgiving, which will require me to cook
rather than relying on MrG to bake a frozen pizza for dinner.

We Love To Hate -- Paula Deen

2005-11-13T08:41:00.000-05:00

Maybe it's just me but watching Paula cook with all of that oil and buuuutter makes my stomach do flip-flops. Down home cooking with her 'boys', a dog in the kitchen, and more grease than you'll find on Brad Pitt's forehead, Y'all.

Paula Deen, with her silver tidal wave of hair and multiple diamond rings that she forgets to remove before every cooking program, has a charm that, for many that is reminiscent of hanging out in grandma's kitchen.

From a book review of The Lady & Sons Savannah Country Cookbook:
I love her warm, upbeat manner and I'm impressed with her Cinderella story which has been recounted by countless other reviewers. Her charm is found all through this title and its sequel and reading the stories behind the recipes is just as enlightening as the recipes themselves. Paula writes the way she speaks, and you can even hear her easy Savannah drawl as you read. The recipes are down-to-earth, mostly pretty simple, and decadently satisfying. Those doing Atkins or Weight Watchers need not apply here...we're talkin' SERIOUS cheese, butter, and cream (yep, the real stuff!).
In his enthusiastic introduction, John Berendt, author of Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, writes: "Authentic Southern food is not about pretension." Sure enough, this book doesn't put on any airs. A great many recipes unabashedly list prepared foods among the ingredients. As an appetizer, Garlic Cheese Spread includes an eight-ounce package of cream cheese and an eight-ounce jar of Cheez-Whiz. Shrimp or Lobster Bisque contains, in addition to seafood, a can each of condensed tomato soup and condensed mushroom soup. The restaurant's most popular dessert is Gooey Butter Cakes, which starts with a box of Duncan Hines yellow cake mix. Still, some of the recipes attain a high level of regional authenticity: Georgia Cracker Salad is made with crushed saltines, tomato, scallions, hard-boiled egg and mayonnaise; Southern Fried Chicken acquires its crispy coating with a batter of eggs and self-rising flour. Readers concerned about high fat content should skip this book.

From the time she was a young girl, Paula has suffered from agoraphobia. That may explain why it's tough to find any interviews with her. I did find her restaurant website which features, what else? A write-up of her brother Bubba's new oyster house, y'all. "Bubba and I are so excited about it. He's even letting me serve some of my home cooking there." Gee, what a swell guy that Bubba.

And don't forget, "And did I mention I have a new cookbook come out soon?" We'll be sure to look fer it, darlin'.